Guys who ask women on dates but refuse to pay?

--Ive been on many dates with guys...usually they pay. Especially if they have money they pay- or if they're the ones asking me out. Recently I met someone on the internet--he bragged about how he owned bars and pubs and would make 5,000 a night--he's going through a divorce and his ex wife is this and that...or she's apparently taking money...he has been asknig me out on dates or to go out every day of this week almost...he seems very bored and just wanting to 'hang out' and with me because I'm female and it seems he's hoping to get something off me. The first three dates- he paid.. however, he asked me out again and said he was 'strapped for cash' until his 'court date' on Tuesday because the judge said he can't use his credit cards, and will release cash to him- to me this sounds really bogus- it seems he's trying to find a way to not pay for dates with me while hanging out and getting to know me. I find that really offensive...that some moron who has enough money to start another restaurant business...and who has an ex wife who is supposedly stealing his tax income returns is trying to go out with a girl and not pay for her- I'm also sick of guys who do this--they are glad that their ex wife is stealing all their moeny and using girls to mooch off of-- girls who don't have money...he also kept insisting to come to my house and that was odd and fishy too--so the last few dates have been me going to some fast food restaurant, eating my meal and then going somewhere else or my place...which just felt strange-- I feel he's just trying to take advantage of me...use someone for their time while giving nothing and hoping to get laid...if his 'court' story and money was true, I would get it..but I really truly doubt he has 'only 40 dollars' in his pocket for the entire weekend...and can't go anywhere with me...i guess I was stupid and for some reason was confused and figured I'd hang out with him but I felt so strange and used...b/c guys like this...who have made so much money...who have ex wives who aer taking their money, who have this and that, ar trying to go out on free dates with women and use them in this way and treat girls like me like crap...while they let their crazy ex's steal from them.. I know guys use the 'im broke tactic' and usually I ditch them in a heartbeat because it shows a lack of care or respect... but this I'm broke till Monday garbage sounded genuine but I do think the guy is lying now...how shud a girl handle this-- just say well if you can't afford to take me out to dinner or a movie or an activity--or even yourself...then why are you asking to go out to these places? I guess I find it odd that if a guy can't afford it why is he asking and in this case-- I don't feel he can't affor dit-- I do think he is lying and hanging around me hoping to get laid or get 'something' who knows or ease his boredom until his divorce case is done...any ideas..he's also in his 40's and last I hung out with him he had 100's in his wallet (last time he paid)

Updates:
i also emailed this guy...telling him how I felt about the money thing..his response was "i think you're special and I like hanging out with you-- it was nice meeting you and I wish you the ebst in life..buh bye"...i feel this guy was fake and a liar and trying to use me for time...or because he was bored...he was trash but I'm also worried he knows where I live..and worse...who really knows the truth about him or what his motives were
ok now I'm screwed...i looked up this guy online stupid me...stupid me...omg stupid me...and I see a mugshot of him on some website...omg

but he did tell me he was charged with tampering with a witness in his wifes restraining order case and they both have it against each other OK so maybe its not that bad but crap wow...i just freaked out...
he sounded like a con-artist type to me and trying to get too far too fast...and also the only guys interested in me, are con-artists and he listened to all my spiritual mumbo jumbo and most guys get creeped out..he didn't listen to anything I said he just imitated it--mimicked...he was a con-artist/sociopath and I did know but was fooled and I'm freaked out now because he knows where I live...im a fool so...im just freaked out...

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Most Helpful Guy

  • yeaaah, the fact that he's going through a divorce with kids and such should be your first red flag. Let alone he doesn't pay? hahahaha, I'm a starving broke college student and I STILL refuse to let the girl pay. Not even for herself.

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    • oh really..wel that's good to know...ive met a lot of college students or broke people who don't pay but that is chivalrous of you...but yes its true...ive just met so many divorced guys in that same situation so it seems normal but it is a red flag...i'll know now next time but I got a really bad feeling about this guy or his intentions and something is bothering me...but what a creep...good to know that

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    • and I didn't trust him in my house alone- when I went to the bathroom...i came back out and my kittens were at my bathroom door freaked out..that was odd and I was a little concerned..i didn't trust the guy at all and yet I thought maybe I was being paranoid...ugh I'm so freaked out that it was true...im just scared...this sucks

    • Ughh.. White Knights like you make me sick...

What Guys Said 2

  • try to indulge in some activity, be with a friend and don't think about him. To err is human; we learn with mistakes. Sometimes it's too late. Most of the times, it's never too late. Try he doestnt contact you and if he does, tell him that some guests/ friends are around just to keep him away...

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  • Jesus H look at that wall of text... AND those updates! o_o

    I get that you have a lot to say but damn edit your text!

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What Girls Said 4

  • We all make mistakes so don't be hard in yourself. Thank god that you see this man for what he is. Let your friends and family know about him. Don't have anymore contact with him no matter how much he tries. I'm sure he will go away and if he doesn't, then get a restraining order but I don't think it will come to that.

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  • Yeah, men going through divorces are getting their rears reamed by their ex-wives...he will never be the same..

    He bragged to get you out...you are probably his wild rebound fling...guys go whackodoodle during divorces.

    He is going to be a major tightwad due to the divorce.

    Baggage.

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  • When I first started reading your question, the first thing that popped in my head was "scam artist". But don't let this guy get in your head. Hopefully buh bye meant just that: game over. If not just play it safe, stary secure and there are measures you can take if he tries to bother you.

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  • when a guy doesn't pay on a date he isn't worth you. point blank, its not polite, urbody knows that a man pays on the date. move on girl, you know better. I am 22 and I have never ever paid on a date! Period ain't gonna happen,

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