Are these dates or not?

So I'm starting to hang out with a guy I used to talk to (we stopped for a while) but now that he's single he's started contacting me again. We've hung out twice and both times he's been flirty and cuddly but I've had to pay my half of the movie/dinner/event/whatever. Now, I'm totally fine with going Dutch occasionally if a guys hurting for money or just to treat them every now and then or if we're just friends...but it's confusing now because he acts very flirty and cute and touchy-feeley (not in a grope-y way but in a "lets-cuddle-during-the-movie way). I don't know if he's feeling me out for dating potential and just letting me pay until then or just wants a cuddle buddy or is just cheap. Anyway...if you text someone all day every day and flirt and hang out and snuggle...but the girl it a date?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it's a hangout.

    Immature guys tend to do this. I had a guy friend like this, we would always hang out, he would come to my area, I would go to his, we would see movies, eat together, etc.

    He did hold my hand and stuff but we never hooked up.

    One time he did take me on a date and paid for me and it was expensive and all. but most times we just did casual things and paid ourselves.

    It turns out he did like me but I wasn't really interested. If I was and had showed more interest we probably would have progressed or at least I would have found out his intentions.

    I used to be less confident, this was a few years ago. I don't think I'd get into this situation again.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds a little more like hanging out than a date. You need to talk to him and tell him you would like to take him out on a date. He should offer to pay the next time.

    • Alright. I mean...he always wants to hang out when we get a chance and he can be real flirty and likes to snuggle/sleep together (actually sleep) and poke me and tries to wrestle, etc. but we've hung out a few times now and he has yet to act on any of his innuendos about going further, physically or relationship wise. I'm fine with being friends, and I'd be fine dating his, but he's still lingering in that weird pre-official middle ground. Is this just how guys are with their female friends?

    • Would he be too nervous to ask you out on a date?

    • Possibly. Why would he be though? It's like he's giving all the signs then doesn't act on them. Maybe he's just not sure yet.

What Girls Said 2

  • I see as a hang out. If he pay half of the time then I think it a date. This is my opinion.

  • I'd say so ^^ but he sounds kinda unreliable. Ask him what he thinks talking too the guy is the bet thing you could do if your not sure if your dating.