I need some advice that I can't seem to get a answer too.
I have been with my girlfriend for 2 months now and we are going great. except...
I don't like when she grinds with random guys at the club when we go together and if I'm not with her. I don't care if its her close guy friends that I know as well. She loves to dance and she knows how to work it. I don't dance with other women because I want to be treated with the same respect. On Friday night, I asked her to just dance with me tonight and I'll dance with you as much as you want. We both danced for a little bit and later in the night she would run off and grind with a random guy in the club. This happened four times that night.
Its a insecurity for me because the last four women I have dated have all cheated on me, and the very last one cheated on me with my best friend of 5 years. It makes me uncomfortable for her to grind on other guys.
I do trust this girl because we have been waiting to have any type of physical relationship so far.
When I talk to her about it, she doesn't believe she is doing anything wrong. She just thinks its dancing. I believe grinding is completely sexual.
It makes me upset that she won't respect me. Am I in the wrong?
She is upset with me that she is independent and she feels that she can do what she wants (to a extent) and that she thinks "why don't you trust me" & "I thought you trusted me"
What should I do and what to think?
Most Helpful Girl
I don't think it's appropriate to just come out and assume this girl is a 'whore', just because she likes to dance with other people than her boyfriend. For some couples, this would not be a big deal. Everyone is going to have a different take on it. For example, yourself and your girlfriend. She thinks it's OK and that if you bring it up you are making a big deal out of nothing. You think it's inappropriate and that she shouldn't behave that way because you don't, out of your respect of your girlfriend and your relationship. Neither of you are wrong. However, if this is one of your boundaries, something you don't want to deal with in a relationship, then you shouldn't have to deal with it. If she wants to be with you and treat you right, in this instance, she needs to respect your wishes and dance with only you. She needs to put your best interest first, and any person who truly wants to treat you right and knows how, will ALWAYS put your best interest first (assuming their needs are being met as well). So tell her what you need from her, if she can't give it to you, then it may be time to reacess your relationship. If she wants to continue dancing with other dudes, then she needs to be single or find a boyfriend whose boundaries would allow her to do so.2