Fellas, why am I still single?!

I'm not ugly, don't get me wrong, I'm not exactly perfect! I'm chatty, witty, funny, sporty, kind etc. Basically, I'm a nice girl! Why do guys only ever see me as a friend? What can I do to change the way I am perceived by you? Please help, I miss spooning so much haha!


1|0
2|9

Most Helpful Guy

  • It's impossible to say without knowing you. However the most likely suggestions have mostly been covered below:

    - You're not as attractive as you think. You don't have to be a supermodel, just not ugly. Alternatively, you might be attractive, but you don't put your looks to good use. You don't have to wear super-low tops and dress like a slut to show off your looks. But occasionally wearing a bit of makeup (ONLY a bit) and getting dressed up is likely to make you get notices a lot more. If you put some pics of yourself on your profile I'm sure we'd be more than happy to give you an honest opinion on your looks.

    - You're one of the lads. It's fine to have male friends and to have some typically male hobbies or interests, but if you just act like a lad, you're only going to attract a limited number of guys. For example it's fine if you're in the army or love football or whatever, but if you walk around farting and threatening people it's not an attractive look. Also, if you go out with a group of girls on a night out or something, you're more likely to get attention than if you go out with 90% lads. A mixed group is good too.

    - You just don't make yourself available. Try flirting a bit more. Instead of waiting for someone to find you irresistible from across the room (which obviously isn't working, no offense), try approaching a few guys. On a similar note, try to look confident and things. If you hide quietly in a corner, there's no wonder nobody has noticed you. However there is a fine line between confident and arrogant/cocky. Don't talk over everyone, act like you're the hottest person in the world, and be a general bitch.

    - There is another possibility... you could be too hot so guys are scared to approach you. But I think that's unlikely based on your description of yourself.

    These are all possible reasons why you might not have lots of people coming after you. However the reality is that most girls are average. You're probably normal. And by definition that means you don't stand out from the crowd. So it's not that people couldn't fancy you, it's just that they don't because you don't do anything to make them fancy you over the next "nice girl". If you wait long enough, then someone will notice you because you'll be a good match for them and you'll be the specific type of sort of "normal" girl that he likes. If you want to speed this up, or if you don't care about him being exactly the right guy to settle down with forever, you just want someone who's company you can enjoy and who you can spoon with then just make yourself more available by doing the things suggested above.

    If you live in the North of England I'd be happy to meet you and give you specific advice and we could maybe even have a spooning session lol.

    I hope this helps. If you want any more help or advice let me know :)

    0|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 8

  • Are you doing anything to make men think of you sexually? That doesn't mean you have to dress in a sleazy way, but it helps to talk in a way that implies that you are a sexual being. You don't have to be crass or rude, but a little flirtation and innuendo every now and then can make you seem more accessible to guys. Keep in mind that a lot of guys subconsciously carry around the "sitcom" image of women as people who hate sex and only ever have it out of obligation.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Maybe you haven't found the right guy yet? You don't wanna rush into a relationship with some guy you wind up breaking up with 2 weeks into the relationship.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Very true.

    • I'd semi disagree with that. There's nothing wrong with dating someone for 2 weeks then splitting up. It can be nice for a couple of weeks and you can get some spooning :) Just because it doesn't last forever doesn't mean it's pointless.

    • I mean to make it official as a relationship opposed to just remaining friends with benefits or a fling, in my opinion, at the end of any break up, someone always ends up hurt.

  • It's hard to meet people when you're in front of a computer keyboard.

    Not impossible (my brother did just that) but difficult.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I don't see where you're coming from with that one! :S

    • I mean if you sit at home on a computer keyboard like you are right now, you won't meet many people. You have to get out more. Although my brother did meet (and marry) someone he met on the internet. It seems like it's not the usual way it happens.

    • Well, bare in mind, I'm from the UK so it's early hours of the morning! I'm always out doing something, work, studying, sport etc. So it's not a question of whether I get out enough I don't think! I seem to spend more time out than I do in my home aha

  • Most of the time it's something to do with your attractiveness. Other times it's to do with other problems in your personality you havn't noticed. There are two good reasons there lol.

    1|0
    0|0
  • LMAO I loved the spooning part.

    Well Miss Happychappy, your question is very hard to answer with so little knowledge on my part. All I can say is, make yourself more available. Smile more, flirt more, and look a little sexier to turn heads.

    0|0
    0|0
  • don't rush getting into a relationship. true love takes time, and it'll usually come when you least expect it. that's why its called falling in love, you can't force it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Are you friends with mostly guys or mostly girls? If the answer is guys that is one strike against you.

    What kind of chatty are you? Do you constantly talk about yourself, your life, your family, your favorite shows and movies? If yes that means you never have time to ask about a guy's life and that might be another strike.

    I don't know if that's any help or not but without knowing you personally it's hard to say why the guys won't take it past friend level.

    0|1
    0|0
  • that's cause you haven't meet me yet. ;)

    but seriously, maybe you're trying to hard or you haven't meet the right guy, just stop looking when the time comes you'll find him. :)

    0|1
    0|0

What Girls Said 2

  • i understand what your saying . The SWEET gentlemen down there are right . But don't waste all that prettiness find a side to hang with or some FWBs to be with for the mean time ! :)

    0|1
    0|0
  • It's not easy to find someone. I'm attractive, and not one of the guys, and all that, but I haven't found someone. I know guys don't see me as a friend but still.

    Maybe you act too much like one of the guys. I don't know how feminine you are..but the fact that you are sporty could mean not that feminine, not necessarily so but it's a possibility.

    Guys like feminine girls.

    0|1
    0|0
Loading...