When do you know that you want to be with someone?

I've been friends with this guy for over a year. We met by being in the same class. I was going through a break up and talked about it a little with him. Our relationship got stronger and we'd see each other more often, out of class and such.

At times, we'd act close, almost like a couple. He'd hold my hand if it was cold. We'd tease each other. Anyway, from the outside, it could look like we're together in that way.

He confessed that he liked me. I told him I didn't feel the same way. afterward, I thought things might get awkward but we continued being friends. The confession was not brought up.

Time passed. He told me things happened with a girl. Twas casual. Which led me to believe that he might not like me that much, he's not serious, etc.

I like hanging out with him. I'm not very attracted to him. Sometimes after we hang out though, I feel weird, like umm.. we just acted like a couple yet we won't see each other till another few weeks. So it's like we get all close, then nothing.

Anyway, I got really hurt from my last relationship. I don't think I'll be in a relationship any time soon.

But, in terms of this guy friend.. could something develop? Should I just spend more time with him?

I've only been with my ex, so I feel weird.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Only you can tell if you like him that way or not. It's not something that you can just check off a bunch of criteria and just be like 'oh, well I must like him in that case'...you just know when you do. However when I know I like someone, there are bunch of things I tend to do. I'd find myself always thinking about her, all the time! And if the feelings are mutual, I'd tell her how I feel. I would always talk to her, try to make her laugh, and just get to know each other inside and out.

    I think in this case you should just continue to spend time with him and see if any feelings develop. Maybe go on a few casual dates and see how they go. Something could definitely develop if you let it. Good luck! :)

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    • Thank you. I spent new years with him. Totally unexpected. XD Watched fireworks, went for drinks. He bought me chocolate for the holidays. I didn't get him neting. And he says things like if he goes away for school, would I not want him to, etc. Anyways, I feel a little bad. I didn't get him anything. And maybe I just don't feel the same. Like I don't see us kissing and all that. He's held my hand through the crowd of people and put his shoulder around me, but I'm just kinda there and eventually

    • discreetly pull away. I might be scared because of the hurt from my ex. But I also don't think I want to pass that line with him, maybe anyone at this moment, for that matter. I do think of him from time to time. And it feels more than what I have for my other friends. We've gone on get togethers just me and him. I feel kind of bad, also. Because it seems like he wants more than I do. Thanks a lot though!

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