I have a question about boundaries and boyfriends....am I overreacting?

So I dated this guy for 9 months. We broke up because he moved to a different university. He came to the uni I am at now recently and we have been hanging out. He told me that breaking up with me was a mistake and that he was miserable without me. We've been seeing each other a few times since he has been back. He asked me out on a date this wed.

I went out tonight and this girl he previously dated came up to him and started grinding/dancing on him. He went along with it but was scanning the crowd. I was right behind him so I stole his hat playfully he looked at me and continued dancing.

My point is, am I overreacting about him dancing/grinding with another girl when we have been hanging out recently and since he asked me on a date to the movies? We Haven't talked yet about where this is going. But the whole grinding with another girl bother me.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • im same as you...i tend to get jealous really easily ha ha so I wouldn't want him dancing with another girl or anything

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    • I agree! Thanks for your answer.

What Guys Said 3

  • Yes, I think you ought to be bothered! He would have begged off if he cared much about your feelings!

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  • i allow my girl to grind with other dudes at a party. Just as long as they don't kiss her or some stupid sh*t like that. Some guy almost kissed my girl after a party (I wasn't there) and I was ready to dump her so fast. I decided to give her one more chance since the kiss wasn't successful.

    But anywho, when I go out to party, I always grind on other girls. I don't just stand there nd look lost with a beer in my hand. My girl found out once and she got super mad. Since then, I don't even tell her I grind with chicks anymore. I just do what I normally do at a party.

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    • Thanks, your answer was really helpful! I guess its all about seeing it from a different perspective. I used to be okay with dancing with other people until he started to chose dancing with them over me and would ignore me to grind with another girl. THAT made me feel bad. But thanks for your perspective.

    • glad I helped. Oh yeah, just so you know, a relationship won't be successful if you don't let your partner flirt here and there once in a while.

  • Real men don't dance :p

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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think you are overreacting, you are right to think it was not nice or respectful of him to do that. It was very rude and just shows how much he wants you back.

    Are you sure you want to get back with someone who doesn't respect you enough?

    When a guy really cares about a girl he doesn't stop watching other girls, but he at least hides it from you. And he would never do what this guy did to you if he was trying to get her back.

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  • I live in an area where there is a lot of night life. And my boyriend and I really enjoy night clubs. At the start of our relationship he told me that it would make him feel uncomfortable if I was to dance with other guys. I told him it shouldn't really matter as long as you are having a good time and don't cross the line.. but he insisted that that was something that was important to him.. So we just decieded that we weren't going to dance with other people when we go out.

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  • i would keep it as a red flag. he either is trying to make you jealous or isn't being considerate.

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