Taking things slow? am I TOO Slow?

would you date a girl who is shy and wants to take things slow? even things like kissing, cuddles and holding hands is a bit much for me if I have only known him for a few weeks. how slow is too slow?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sorry but that's just too slow. Occasionally touching the hand comes after 3 or 4 meetings (they don't have to be dates as long as they as long conversations). Kissing comes naturally after I feel the girl is comfortable with me touching her hair. As far as cuddling goes, kissing basically is a green light to cuddling. I usually assume (most guy probably too) that the girl doesn't like me if she has issues with me touching her hands at least. Sorry that's just me :-(

    Btw I know a couple of guys (who are virgins), that don't have an issue with how your behaving. I think you behavior is fine, with guys that are virgins. Hope it helps :-)

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    • what if she told you she liked you though?

What Guys Said 5

  • I feel like I'm dealing with a girl like you right now. We have kissed but then she told me everything is moving far too fast. She told me she wants to take it slow, just be friends, and see if it develops into more. After making this clear to me she still said we could hang out a few days after this talk if I wanted to. Why tell me we can hang out if she's not serious about "taking it slow"? I'm going to try it even though this is new to me...I move fast.

    In short, it can be tough but perhaps worth it in the long run.

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  • I would date a girl like that

    i currently am dating a girl like yourself.. I usually waot for a girl to break the touch barrier when I notice she doesn't like to be touched

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  • I personally couldn't stand it. Like...if I love a person I have to express it in every way I can. I don't know how to slow down when I'm passionate.

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    • how can you love someone if you don't know them very well? I'm talking about the first few weeks of dating...

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    • thats not love. It's lust.

    • It's not though. I've only slept with one woman and not for years at that. I don't know how I could ever help you to understand me. I am in love with being in love.

  • Thats a little too slow for me

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    • I think I'm too slow for all guys :( but I am just shy and I don't want a relationship based on physical things..

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    • well I don't want him to use me for physical things... I want him to want me because he likes my company and we have things in common... if we spend too much time kissing and things then we can't really get to know each other very well, because he will be concentrating on that too much, rather then me as a person. Also I am not comfortable getting that close with someone I don't know that well... I'm talking about the first few weeks of dating

    • well that's OK then as long as there is some physical affection I can understand not wating to be used

  • Well it depends, it can go either way. I understand that some want to take it slow, but if it took too long, I would probably feel that she didn't like me.

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    • what if she told you she liked you?

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    • most guys say that :( I've never had a boyfriend because all guys I have been on dates with have tried to kiss me on the first date... I'm too shy for that but they just think I don't like them, even if I do :(

    • Well I'm not demanding a kiss on the first date, but after several weeks...

What Girls Said 1

  • Patience is a must, you can't force them to move forward//or//faster because you could push them away

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