Is this typical of rebound relationships?

I was with my ex for only 6 months, but it was the first relationship I had had in 3 years. It was mostly a mutual break up, but I didn't really want to, I could just see it wasn't working out and he wasn't going to fight for it. We broke up about 2 months ago and 3 weeks after the break up I met someone else. I didn't start seeing the new guy until a couple weeks later, after I got some closure with my ex.

When I first started seeing the new guy things were really great. We were spending a lot of time together and the more time I spent with him the less I thought about my ex. Things were really exciting at first, but now we seem to be getting into more of a routine. I am thinking less and less about the new guy and more and more about my ex.

I have never been in a rebound relationship before, but I have heard that a lot of times when it doesn't work out it can make you feel worse about the first break up. Has anyone experienced that?

I really felt like I have come a long way in getting over my ex, if things don't work out with the new guy is that going to set me further back in the moving on process?


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • "I am thinking less and less about the new guy and more and more about my ex." This is what you need to focus one.

    See, I don't believe the new guy is a rebound. You refused to start a relationship with him until you somehow got over your ex meaning that it wasn't really a rebound. Usually people do rebound relationships for revenge or to feel good about themselves or to make their ex's jealous. You didn't hang out with the guy for any of the reasons I mentioned. You did because you like him and you enjoy his company. So, it isn't a rebound in my honest opinion.

    What you should focus on is the line I highlighed up there. Forget about the rebound idea and focus more about how you feel towards the new guy. It seems like you were hoping to get along with him, but it turns out that he couldn't fill up your senses. He isn't the one for you. You started to think more about your ex because the new guy couldn't fill that empty space your ex left in you. You are unconciously comparing him to your ex. He doesn't make you feel happy like the way your ex did.

    I believe you haven't still moved on which is sensible. It takes time to get over a lover with whom you shared a lot of emotions. I don't think the new guy have any effect on you and leaving him will not affect the moving on process. It depends on you, not on anyone else.

    I believe you shouldn't be with the new guy if he couldn't make you happy. Life is too short. You should be with a guy who would make you the happiest girl alive. You will someday. :)

    Forget about the rebound idea. Focus on yourself. Focus on your passions, desires and happiness. Discover what you want and how to make it happen. :)

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    • I think I really only started feeling less for the new guy a couple nights ago when we were supposed to go out. He had to run a couple errands first and got caught up because he ran into some friends and ended up hanging out with them for long then intended. He kept me waiting around for him all night and it pissed me off. I know these things happen but I think I was more upset because my ex did that all the time and for the first time I saw in him what I hated about my ex

    • In this case, you should give him a chance. He just reminded you of your ex. :)

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