So, I saw a friend on a dating site?

So, I saw a friend of mine on a dating site. I thought it was pretty funny, and I was about to message her. But, would that be sketchy? It might be a little embarrassing haha. Any opinions?

Updates:
now I found 2 friends... :O well, the thing is one friend is newish and the other haven't seen in a while. I know people usually don't respond to question updates. but, would that change things?
I'm not being judgmental. I just thought it was "funny" as in an odd coincidence. Not in a bad way, just surprising.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would definitely feel a little embarrassed, but hey everyone wants to be loved right? I was online and a friend of mine messaged me. I just took it for what it was and said hey back. Everyone wants to find someone, that is why they are on the site. Why not say hi to a friend while you are there? :P

    I think they might actually be relieved if they knew that you were also on there. Because it's hard for me to find people who don't think I am weird for dating someone I met online. But I found out my friend met her boyfriend online so now I am so happy I have someone to talk to about it! :D

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What Girls Said 12

  • It really depends on the girl. I doubt they would find that sketchy. I'd be more worried about if she'd be embarrassed to be found on one. Some people, especially girls, don't like that stuff to be known. But she could just be the type that doesn't care. She's your friend so you're probably the better person to determine how she'd react.

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  • It would be embarrassing, she probably hasn't told people she's on the site because she might feel a little ashamed about it. Even if she's not, if you wanted to get with her (aka the whole point she's on the site) you could do it in real life. Leave her alone.

    Also, don't be so judgemental! While you're laughing and about to message her, YOU'RE on the dating website too so you're no better than her! Tis a bit hypercritical don't you think?

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    • I'm not laughing. This is a serious question. If anything, finding an old and new friend on the site makes me think dating sites aren't do sketchy.

    • *so. Not "do". Stupid autocorrect

    • Sorry if I misread your question, it came across that you were making fun of her for being on a dating website. I apologize.

  • I have a friend that is on a dating site. One day she asked me to log in as her and look through the profiles because she had looked at them so much that she felt maybe they were running together for her. I came across several profiles for people I know (several employees that she didn't know and one of my single family members).

    Because I am not a member of the site, I would have never contacted them but it did reinforce my thoughts on ever getting on a site like that. I was shocked at some of the people and thought what they wrote wasn't indicative of the type of person they present in face to face meetings.

    I have nothing against dating sites. I believe they are really just another forum for meeting people as opposed to a bar or church or through mutual friends. I don't think there is anything wrong with anyone that uses them.

    If you're not interested in your friend as a date (or potential prospect), contacting her isn't bad if you are just saying hi. However, you have to be careful because she may think you are interested in her and if she isn't interested in you it could be very awkward.

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  • Eh, idk. Personally, even though I don't find dating site weird or anything, I still don't want people I actually know reading my profile, its so personal! So if I were online and someone I know messaged me just to say hi, I'd be a bit embarrassed.

    Keep in mind though, that if she were into you, something may have already happened, so if you approach it, do so with caution.

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  • Well if you're on the dating site too then I don't think that's a problem, she wouldn't be embarrassed if you're both using the same site. Just be friendly about it rather than being all hey I caught you lol

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    • @Update: No it shouldn't, if you wanna contact them that's fine. Depends on why you wanna contact them in the 1st place.

  • Personally I think it would depend on the girl- If she's a girl whos fairly care-free, laid back and up for a laugh then I'd say it can't hurt. But if she's a bit of a nervous wreck and takes everything really seriously then I'd advise against it, it could be a bit overwhelming for her :P

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  • I was on a dating site once, and one of my friends from high school was on there too. He messaged me and we actually dated for a few months.. If you like her, you should message her!

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  • Don't do it

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    • agreed, if your already her "friend" and you find her attractive, then messaging her on this dating site is completely creepy. Why? because you have pretended up to this point to only be interested in platonic friendship! (aka your full of sh*t)

  • I once found a teacher from high school on a dating website and I made the stupid mistake of looking at the profile and he messaged me on there and was trying to act all funny and flirt with me and it was just really awkward and he tried giving me his number. Thankfully I had been out of high school for a year so it wasn't as awkward because I didn't have to see him in person, but it was weird. Thankfully I never had him as a teacher he was just teacher at my high school, but it made me wonder how many kids at school he's tried to creep on...

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  • just let her be, her life her business. don't judge.

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  • i've come across profiles of familiar people too. it's embarrassing at first to know that they could possibly stumble across my profile and read all of the cliche optimistic stuff I've written about myself but in the end, we're there for same reason. unless of course they're just browsing the site and don't have a profile- that's just questionable on their end.

    but regardless, be mature and nice about it.

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  • haha I am on a dating website too and I find people I know all the time! we message each other and just "joke" about it... we are both in there so, why would it be embarrassing? :P... just ask "any luck yet?!?!" haha

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What Guys Said 6

  • Send her a funny message and ask her out, but insist that she is going to pay for everything! Follow that up with another message and ask her how her love life has been going on the site? Be funny and joke around, she probably could use a bit of humor after wading through thousands of bland copy-and-paste messages. :)

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  • Well your on the site too right?

    I would message her and make fun. that's just me.

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  • if its your friend so you shouldn't think about your message, just message her

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  • If I were you I would just act as if I didn't see her... Not a big deal.

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  • You should just tell her hey or hi and leave it at that or ask for tips for online dating...

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  • On one hand it would be awkward but on the other hand, it would be more awkward if you told her in person or had to hide it.

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