Ladies if a guy pays or does something for you do you think you owe him something?

I ask cause I was out with a friend and I offered to pay for lunch and she said "no way you will expect me to owe you something "

I was kinda shocked. I said "yes I would like to see a smile and a thank you " I told her I do stuff for friends cause I want to not cause I have an agenda... Needless to say she looked at me with a surprised face.

Am I wrong? I thought "a thank you " is the polite thing to say...and I love a women's smile it gets me every time...


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Most Helpful Girl

  • The way I think of it is, if you pay for me now because I'm broke, I'll cover you the next time we go out when I'm not broke.

    I don't see an issue with that. But some females would rather pay themselves so they don't feel obligated to pay you back later.

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    • I see what you mean. I guess she doesn't know me well enough I guess. I don't expect anything in return ever

    • Did you let her know that?

      I mean if you guys are best friends or really good friends than it would not be an issue as long as there is a trust between you two. But if you both don't know each other that well, it could be an issue for her.

What Girls Said 7

  • Well no but I have my ways when it comes to who pays for stuff in my relationship. If we're going out on a date, my boyfriend usually pays for me and I tell him 'thank you' following by a kiss. If I see he's not putting himself out there to pay, I make sure to pay for myself ASAP, so he has to ask me to pay. I don't want him to pay all the time, so when he doesn't make the first move I take care of it. For instance, last week we went out to a bar with friends and he paid for my food and beer (± $20-25). We went out again the next day with friends and I paid for my own ticket without saying anything ($20). We have another date on Friday and I paid for my $10 ticket. It's all fine to me, but if he asks me out to dinner days in advance, I kinda expect it to be on him.

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  • hahaha I think she got burned before..but I am surprised that she said that to you..lol

    she's quite frank..maybe she is not used to be ing treated kindly..she is just being careful

    you're just being nice..i don;t think you did something wrong (:

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  • Sometimes yes I feel I awe people who pay for my stuff.. I feel uncomfortable too until I give them their money back.

    Sometimes.

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    • Hmmmmmmm I see what you mean. But it was just lunch. Lol

    • Yeah my friends say that too.. They say: "Come on, it doesn't deserve paying back!" lol...

      But I don't like to be awed to anyone.. It's just in some situations! ^^

    • I can respect that.

  • I appreciate, but it makes me a little uncomfortable when male acquaintances pay for my stuff. Not because I feel like I owe him something. It just makes me uncomfortable when other people pay for me in general.

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  • No, if he offers, I don't think I owe him anymore than a nice 'thank you'.

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  • no I don't but I also don't expect him to pay every time or to just shell out a bunch of money and effort for nothing. but that doesn't mean I owe him a bj or money its about putting forth the same amount of effort as he is no matter how or when I show it. But sometimes guys expect stuff so I understand where she is coming from

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    • It was just lunch. It is not an on going thing. I just thought of it as a kind gesture. And I'm not one of those guys. And I do agree on the same effort part you mentioned if it were a regular lunch thing or whatever.

    • that is strange, I don't think women think that way very often

  • I don't really like people paying for me but if someone did I would definitely thank them and probably pay the next time. It makes me feel like I owe them and I don't like owing people money...I always pay people back as quick as possible.

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    • Even if they said don't worry about it I was happy to do it.

    • I would for sure thank them but I would probably still want to pay at some point in the future to return the favor.

    • Well you wouldn't if you were my friend! Lol

What Guys Said 4

  • Obviously, accepting favors from a guy has landed her in an uncomfortable situation before.

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  • Well you should have answered something funny like "yeah, I hope you like anal. Just kidding". Then it would have been massive lol ;)

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  • What a bitch, never treat her out again.

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  • surprised face? wow

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