okay so over the beginning of summer this guy (we'll call him Joe.. no real names here), Joe, him and I liked each other a LOT. well, we never got the chance to date and I guess I somewhat have "moved on". but my best friend said that like 6 months ago she was talking to him and he still wasn't over me. and I am saying right now, I am in one of the happiest relationships ever and I couldn't ask for more, with a guy named Justin (again, no real names). but whenever I talk to Joe, I still think that I need to have that chance with him. Like today, I haven't talked to Joe in forever, and I saw him going up the stairs today, so I said "JOE!" and he screamed my name and we had a big hug and he carried me up the stairs. and that right there, I hate to admit, but I got the feelings for Joe all over again. like I need that chance to date him, and I can't let go of my feelings for him. but I just can't leave Justin, because I know that he loves me, and I love him too. but then again, Joe and I have told each other we have loved each other over the summer. and I have "loved" Joe longer. and I really do love him. so I really don't know what to do. girls and guys, what would y'all do if you were in my situation? and guys, what would you want to hear from the girl in this situation? any answers help(: thanks(:
If y'all were in my shoes, what would you do!?! This is so confusing...
What Guys Said 1
You don't love either of them.
You're basically already cheating on your current boyfriend.
You focus on one person and stick to it.
Any straying, and you need to break up with your current and choose the other.
No, you did not just "suddenly have feelings for joe" when he carried you up the stairs.
That's called infatuation for someone else's sweet actions.
That's how men can get women into bed so easily, a false sense of security, some sweet talking, some nice eye contact, makes the woman feel at home.
I'm not saying that's what's happening, but that is what kind of feeling you're having.
You can care for, and bout both of them.
But I can tell you right now you don't love both of them.0
What Girls Said 1
My best friend went through the same thing, and I told her the same advice I will tell you, if "Joe" is crazy about you now, he will be when things don't work out with 'Justin', not saying it won't but if you're thinking about another man while you are in a relationship, you clearly are not in love as you go out to be. So in my opinion if you have strong feelings for Joe then give it a go with him and don't let Justin stay in a relationship with someone that thinks about other men.
Another option is if Justin really loves you, you could explain your predicament and ask to go on a break and if it doesn't work with Joe then hopefully Justin will welcome you back with open arms--this is really doubtful of working but as I said before; if he really does love you then it could work.1
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