Ended both dates with kiss and a hug, does she move at a slower pace?

I've had two dates with this girl at my school. We have a ton in common and my friend set us up because we both thought each other were cute.

Thursday I took her to get ice cream and we physically flirted a lot. We came back and watched a movie and had a great time. Talked, flirted, etc. I walked her back and it was probably 50-50 moving in for the kiss.

-We kissed, she hugged me, then kissed again. She was smiling the whole time and we planned for something Sunday

Sunday she came over and I made her some food I already had at my place. She was wearing sweats and a sweatshirt and we just hung out. Also she has left her DVDs here both times. I walked her back.

-We kissed, then she hugged me and patted my back, then we kissed again and planned for possibly something during the week.

I don't mind the slower pace, but are these all good signs?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sounds to me that's she's just a little shy. She's into you clearly - otherwise she would respond to the kisses and return them, she also wouldn't keep making plans to spend time with you again and again.

    Maybe next time you hang out - try initiating a little more contact during the date. I mean nothing full on, she obviously likes to take her time in terms of getting too physical - but break the barrier of things just happening at the end of the date. If you want to kiss her during the date. Make her see the the date isn't just a mean to an end for you - that you're not just doing this so that at the end of it you'll get something; some girls think that way. We can get a little paranoid at times.

    But honestly, it seems to me she's into you. The pace isn't slow really. You're just getting to know each other. You're sharing kisses. And it looks to me like she's just looking at you for the 'okay' as such. She's still tentative so initiating things more often - but not too often, might make her more confident in the idea that it would be okay for her to initiate things too at some point.

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    • ok. I can't tell if she's backing off and not interested or shy because other girls have been much more open to physical flirting. I don't look at it for a means to an end but it's nice to be physical every once in a while

    • Yeah - I know you don't, but I'm saying that might be the way she's seeing it. Possibly. If she was backing off - she wouldn't say yes to more dates when she knows how they've ended. You're worrying about nothing; she's just a little more shy and nervous than girls you're used to perhaps. You just need to draw some confidence out of her.

What Girls Said 5

  • You are definitely moving towards the friend zone if you are not already there. I really like this guy before but things never moved past the friend zone because every time we spoke or hung out it was very casual. I guess the only thing to do is to try to not keep things so casual just yet, take her out to dinner or if you re hanging out in your place try sitting closer to her or putting your arms around her while watching a movie, stuff like that. Just always try to keep a romantic intimate setting.

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  • Ha! This is kind of funny because I'm guilty of giving my crush a "pat on the back" hug, just because I'm shy and kind of awkward. It may not be obvious to you, but perhaps she's never had that type of affection and feels awkward with it. But yes, these are all good signs. If you don't mind a slower pace like you said, do take it slow :)

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    • really? I was confused by the pat on the back.

    • are you sure the pat on the back and wanting to hang in a group doesn't mean I'm friendzoned?

    • Um, I don't think you're friend zoned simply because of the kiss. Putting myself in her shoes, you're not.

  • ask her where it's going. only she knows what she's thinking.

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  • Its a good sign if you keep making "dates". But the whole pat on the back throws me off! That's what I do to my "FRIENDS". She seems to be interested in you, otherwise she wouldn't be making plans to hang out again. The fact she wore sweats, shows that she is comfortable with you. You ask about slower pace? Are you asking, because she hasn't tried to have sex? If so, just know that all women don't drop their panties so soon. Some women respect themselves more than others. Just go with the slower pace, ask her if she is interested in being more than friends. If you're interested in her as in more than friends, just tell her.

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    • It's not fully because of the sex. It's because of the pat on the back. Maybe she's not comfortable with affection that much but the pat on the back was weird

  • Sound like good signs to me. First off she allowed you to kiss her, second she left items at your house that she would either have to be comfortable enough to trust you to hold on to them or that she would come back to your home enough to leave them there. I am glad that you are OK with the slower pace, this is how dating should be. When a relationship goes too fast too quick it clouds judgement of what you see and more importantly what you don't see that will determine if you should continue the relationship or not and drastically changes the dynamic of the relationship for women.

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What Guys Said 4

  • All good signs (implications from back patting negated by further kissing).

    You need to escalate the kissing soon, at least. It'll help to build sexual tension and let her know that you've got a sex drive and that you want her, even if it's not right now.

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  • What are you expecting beyond this, her to have sex with you? Because this seem like a pretty fast pace to me. The only thing faster would be if you guys f***ed on the first date.

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  • Yes..all very good signs...Just keep going slow...when girls have high interest level.. as a guy you can't move too slow...

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  • Slower pace? She's kissing you, man

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