Men. I need your advice. lol

if you kiss a girl/makeout with her

before dating her or whatever. does that ruin the chances of you guys having a relationship in the future?


1|0
0|19

Most Helpful Guy

  • No, but having sex (including oral) certainly does.

    It's a crappy double-standard, but it definitely exists. A guy will always want sex, and will always be moving toward sex, "rounding the bases" to use the baseball metaphor. But he expects the girl to push back and set the pace; basically, to slow him down. If a girl goes too far on the first couple of dates/hangouts, he'll happily let her, but he won't respect her anymore (he'll assume she lets every guy do those things), and he'll never want a relationship with her. He won't consider her "relationship material" because she was too easy with him, so he assumes she is just as easy with other guys too, so he can't trust her.

    Is that fair? Not completely, no, but in practice, a girl who lets him move to fast often IS easy, and his lack of trust IS often justified, so most guys won't take the chance of being burned.

    As I say constantly here, if you want a RELATIONSHIP, you'd better get it BEFORE you have sex, or you'll never get it at all.

    2|1
    0|0

What Guys Said 18

  • If you're attractive and nice to him, then it won't hurt your chances.

    If you're fat/ugly, or have a bad personality, then yes it will not help.

    If you're looking for a relationship, then it's best to talk for a good while before attempting the kiss.

    Otherwise, if you've just met and haven't said anything to connect any form of emotional bonding, he'll think of you as a possibility of a casual sex buddy but nothing more.

    0|0
    0|0
  • For most guys, I doubt it would "ruin the chances." If the girl just wanted sex before dating, it might make it more difficult to have a relationship in the future.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I don't care how many people someone has been, with or how fast or slow they want to take sex. The only thing I really care about in the end is what kind of person they are personality wise and how compatible they are with me. If someone wants to wait for sex or do it right away I won't care either way and certainly won't judge them as being a prude or slut. That's just me though must guys like to judge girls very quickly based on either their lack of sex or overabundance of sex.

    2|0
    0|0
  • Depends on the guy.. doesn't matter really.

    If the guy wants to just bang you and run - it won't change his ways whether or not you do anything with him.

    But if you actually want to have a relationship, doing.. basically anything physical too early when you're not quite sure are you both involved or not will do no good.

    Even if the guy will be "the right one" he will be turned off that you yield too fast, wandering with how many guys already you were messing around if it took so little time...

    2|0
    0|0
  • I wouldn't say so. It really depends on my relationship with the girl. I don't like making out with girls who aren't my girlfriend tho

    0|0
    0|0
  • For me, having sex first wouldn't hurt the chances (though its no guarantee either). For some guys it would.

    A guy who thinks you are a slut if you kiss him before being a couple has serious issues.

    0|1
    0|0
  • A lot of great relationships start with an 'accidental' makeout.

    1|0
    0|0
  • No. If that was true, I wouldn't be married to the woman I'm currently married to.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Personally it does not affect my decision. I was seeing a girl for the past few months until February and we kissed the first time that we hung out. It didn't send any "wrong" message or anything and it was actually quite nice and made it clear how we felt about each other.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Hell no, if anything it INCREASES the chances of having a relationship because kissing and making out releases chemicals that make you like the person even more.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I've never made out with someone before dating them but as long as we got along and I wanted to spend more time with them than it doesn't matter we made out before our first date.

    0|0
    0|0
  • just kissing and making out? that wouldn't be enough for me to say no we can't be together. sleeping with the dude? that would be a little different.

    1|0
    0|0
  • No, its a huge bonus!

    1|0
    0|0
  • Not at all. If anything it makes the whole courtship process less stressful. See if there is anythinh physical, then if there is more. Don't have to wonder abot a first date kiss because it wad a first kiss then date! You are fine

    1|0
    0|0
  • i wouldn't think so just shows where you want to take the relationship

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not at all, it actually doesn't affect the decision at all.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No. I'd say it improves it actually. Especially if it was a good kiss.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sometimes things just happen. I don't see a problem here.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 0

No girls shared opinions.

Loading...