How can I not look stupid when telling guys I've never had a boyfriend?

I've never had a boyfriend, and throughout the years I've tried my best to improve as much as I can, both inside and out. I'm a very nice person, I have a good heart, I'm caring, I'm fun and not shy, people say I'm funny, and I'm positive. I'm of coarse no Angelina Jolie or Megan Fox, but I am pretty, I like to take care of myself and my personal hygene. I am open minded and very understanding of people and not into materialistic things. I go to school and work, and don't really meet many guys. When I go out, I still don't meet many guys. I don't get invited to many parties since my friends rarely have them. Where can I go to meet guys? People say let love come to you, and some people say to go out and get it myself. This Valentine's day I was kind of sad and I sometimes cry about it, (I know it sounds stupid) I feel I have to be lucky like all the other girls who have bfs. I don't know if the one for me exists. How did you meet your current husband/wife? I'm 19


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Aww, please don't cry, a womans eyes should never be full of tears unless theyre tears of joy. this goes out to you and all the other girls in your situation, and there are many: there is nothing wrong with you, you're not some ugly, undesirable freak, and any guy who shuns away because you told him you never had a boyfriend is a total a**hole douchebag and you know you deserve better.

    The reality is, the few great guys that are out there don't care if you've never had a boyfriend. In all honesty, if I met a great girl I really liked and I was her first boyfriend I would truly feel honored. The society we live in puts so much pressure and emphases on dating, relationships, and sex that if you're not doing one of those, it makes you feel like you're a loser or are missin out. We all want love, we all want that one person we can share our life with and we all feel great loneliness many times in our lives so you are not alone.

    It sounds like you're doing fine in terms of putting yourself out there, parties are not the only place to meet people. Get involved in organizations on campus or elsewhere. Pick up hobbies that put you in contact wih people of similar interests. Align activities you get involved in wih who you are, that way you can meet like minded people.

    In the end, you're 19, super young and have your entire life ahead of you. It doesn't help finding love if you're always thinking you'll never find it. You sound like a great, normal girl and any guy would be lucky to have you. Just focus on you, filling your life, and doing what you love and life will bring you to someone when you least expect it.

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    • aww you're so sweet, thank you for your answer and taking the time to my question

What Guys Said 6

  • you know your pretty why can't you walk up to a guy you like and talk to him, ask him out etc

    guys are NOT the ones to have to do the approaching, when they do they are players when they don't they are mostly the nice guys and... loves not going to come to you if you arnt going to go for it especially if your a girl ... guys can't have much control here ... when I had my first girlfriend she asked me out but I'm single now she just didn't want me anymore and I don't know why but that was 16 or so years ago and I'm still alone

    and just because you never had a boyfriend doesn't make you stupid to a guy

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  • i'm 22 and never had a girlfriend, still a virgin, I hate how we guys always have to do the pursuing, chasing, initiating

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  • Try to look really smart.

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  • Dudes think the same way, you'll know when your with a mature guy because alotta young men try to be cool and not be themselves so you just have to wait

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  • i'm 21 and in the same boat

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  • Well, it's not much of a consolation, but I'm almost 22 and never had any of that. You can know that there is always someone in worse off way than you. Good luck :)

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What Girls Said 6

  • Don't worry, I know everyone always says this, but I'm in exactly the same situation as you...

    eighteen- never had a boyfriend- never been kissed (though I hate to admit it)

    I know why you're worrying. my parents met when they were seventeen, and married at twenty-one (both of them have had previous relationships). I'm eighteen and haven't even had a boyfriend , and it feels a little bit like my time is running out ...(as dumb as that sounds).

    I'm not exactly sure where to meet guys... but I'm just assuming, through mutual friends, if you make more friends... you will make more friends through those friends and so on..

    you just need to try and widen your social circle a bit and meet as many new people as possible.

    -maybe some of these new friends will have parties aka: opportunities for you to meet more people, or ill invite you out to places..

    pubs? clubs?

    I know I probably didn't help... but sometimes its nice to know there's other people out there in the same situation... so you're not completely alone in that aspect. goodluck in the future!

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    • thank you sweety, you seem nice, I hope you find someone soon :)

  • I'm sorry.

    Maybe you could try a dating website. It's not that bad. All kinds of people on there nice, normal ones, some military, and of course the creepers you just gotta weed 'em out.

    As for telling guys about your dating past. Don't. At least not right away. The right guy won't care and will be patient.

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  • I'm sorry, don't worry. I mean I didn't even get my first kiss till I was 18. You won't look stupid. Whenever I say I've never had a boyfriend most people refuse to believe it lol or they say, "Wow, somebody's missing out." It makes me feel better about myself. Yes the one for you does exist. You'll probably find him in the most unlikely place. But you'll find him eventually.

    Do take the initiative to try to put yourself in a situation where you're more likely to meet that guy. You can't just sit at home and wait for him to drop from the sky.

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    • thank you :) I appreciate it

  • Possibly the best thing you could do for yourself and future you is focus on yourself without a guy. I agree that it will come, and I have often regretted dating even at 18. It was too soon and too distracting.

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  • its okay i've only had one and its not worth it

    your heart just ends up broken

    people aren't serious about dating till later 20's

    now i'm in a depression

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  • of course you will.

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