Is there a way of getting a guy to want more than just sex?

I've been friends with benefits with a guy friend of mine for a while. We've both developed feelings for each other, I want a relationship but he doesn't - he keeps saying he's not ready and been badly hurt in the past. Is there anything I can I do to make him want more than just sex from me and what can I do to make him want a relationship with me? Please help.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • if he had feelings for you like he says then he would want to be with you. You can't make someone want to be with you if they don't want to. Its heartbreaking I know but the best thing to do is leave him alone so you can have time and space to get over him because he obviously doesn't want the same thing you want. He might have said he likes you because he doesn't want to mess up the benefits situation, but you have to go by his actions not his words. Don't allow yourself to be used by him in hopes of a relationship that may never happen.

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What Guys Said 4

  • you have already failed the chance of a relationship by becoming his shag buddy, no guy will become part of a relationship with someone who has been a shag buddy with them, so you have probably ruined your chance for something real with him by agreeing to be his fwb, next time, don't fall for the friends with benefits scene, its a reputation you won't want, and it ruins any chance of blokes thinking highly of you,x

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  • No, it isn't going to happen.

    Please read this:

    link

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  • Either

    A) he's lying, and the reasons he doesn't want a relationship are either he thinks he can do better then you, or he doesn't want to be monogamous

    B) he's telling the truth, and is afraid the sex will vanish if you actually have a relationship.

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  • There are only certain a select few types of girls that can handle a friends with benefits relationship. And those are girls with family issues, daddy issues and just plain sluts. But without these misfits, there wouldn't be so many happy guys out there who got to bang so many girls. These kinds of girls also happen to be the best in bed and the most adventurous. It goes without saying that dating one of these creatures is a terrible idea. I know quite a few of them and bang them whenever I'm bored, which is often. They know that I'm not interested in dating them and stop pursuing to save face. That is probably what the guy is thinking.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Men, are easy. Unlike us, they SAY what they MEAN, and MEAN what they SAY

    FwB girls are just as bad as girls on the Booty Call list. It will be damn near next to impossible to get him to see you as more than just a piece of ass, no matter how much he likes you personally.

    There is a way to give yourself a fighting chance, but I don't have the necessary amount of space to go into it here.

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  • You can't force him or any guy to be in a relationship with you. You've done all you can do by informing him that you want a relationship. Stop having sex with him because you are only going to hurt yourself more & move on.

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  • not if you already had sex before dating

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