It seems so disrespectful. WHY does he do this?

When we text, he almost always takes time to respond. He's not a big texter; no big deal. But then there are times when he'll ask me a question, I'll answer, and he won't respond. Period. And then a week later, he'll talk to me about something unrelated. What the heck? Why does he do this? It seems so disrespectful. I even brought it up once and he said, "Oh you mean that last text you sent? Oh yeah" and then answered it. So he's not just forgetting; he knows he hasn't responded. WHY is he doing this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Guys ask a question to get information, not to open a conversation.

    When he asked a question, one of two things happened - you gave him an answer, in which case the conversation stops. Or you didn't give him an answer, and tried to open a conversation, which he wasn't interested in, so he stopped.

    e.g.

    "Are you going to the club next weekend?"

    "Yes, it should be good. What do you think I should wear?"

    He got his answer. Yes. That' all he wanted.

    Compare with

    "Are you going to the club next weekend?"

    "Why?"

    He realized this isn't going to get him anywhere, so he doesn't respond.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Texting isn't a real conversation. I never put much weight in texting. If you want to talk call me or we'll meet in person. The less you care about texting the better.

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    • This dude's not answering a phone and he's not moving his pretty little behind for us to see each other often, so texting it is.

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    • builds attraction* He might just be an absent minded texter. I know some guys take it pretty casually. Some people feel there's an obligation to respond to someones text but others don't see that. If he asks a question and you give him a response without any follow up he might treat the conversation as over.

    • I hope that's the case.

  • I think he's either A) a good guy trying not to come across as desperate, B) he's a douchebag who's trying to "keep you hooked" or C) believes that there's nothing more to be said after a question is answered. You know him better, so you should be able to tell which is the case.

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    • It's not A. We've been talking for far too long for that. If anything, he thinks he has me wrapped around his finger. B SHOULD be the case, but he is not that much of a jerk; I don't know why he acts jerky sometimes.

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    • When he does things like this. It's so disrespectful. If he was really crazy about me, we'd be talking every day. He'd make sure to get on my good side. But he doesn't. He just seems to play it cool. It's not entirely his fault. I play it cool too, albeit not quite as cool as him.

    • Well, a lot of what might be making you doubt him over the phone/internet could be the inflection of his voice and his body language. Bland texting habits and such can come across as apathetic when that's not how its meant. Does he come across as apathetic in person?

  • Is he required to respond to every answer you give him? I can see if it is an important question but if it is not something like"Did you get your medicine that will help you to get better?" You answer "no :( " then he never responds to it then I could understand. Texting is not such a great way to talk. He may be like me. I hate to text.

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    • It's something he asks me to start a conversation. Like, "What did you do this weekend?" or "Any big plans for this holiday?"

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    • Thank you for trying.

    • You are welcome

  • Keeps you hooked.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Just gets distracted or can't be bothered replying or is bored

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    • I could understand that once or twice but it's a pattern.

    • That sounds completely disrespectful. As an outsider, I highly recommend you don't speak to them again. But look at me! I'm a hypocrite!

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