What is suggested that I do? Other than say 'bye' please.

This girl and I have known each other a long time and have talked almost everyday since we first met, 5 years ago, through IM, texting, phone calls, and skyping. Mostly texting though. For the first time in a year we saw each other and she kinda distanced herself from me, anytime I would try to talk to her I always felt like the last thing she wanted to do was talk to me. Even though she confessed that she really liked me still and was hoping for a day when we could truly date a few days before we saw each other. At the end of the church camp/retreat she approached me and said she had a strange week. When I asked how she said that the few days before the camp when we weren't talking she didn't know what to do other than talk to me. So she said that she felt like it would be best if we took a break from talking so much cause she wanted to 'find' herself. When we finally said bye though, her and I had a long hug compared to the other goodbyes. So far I have done like she wanted, which is surprising cause I am really clingy, it has been 4 days now since the camp and no contact with her. How long should I wait? What could be going on with her? Is it hopeless now? I am confused.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with the other comments. Wait a little longer and just leave her a nice message letting her know that if she ever wants to talk again in the future, you will be there. And then leave it at that. Think of it as possible closure.

    If she resumes her friendship with you again, then great. If not, then that's OK. Move forward. At least you know that whatever you guys had ended because she chose to end it and not because of a failure to do something on your part.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I say shoot her a casual message, tell her there's no pressure and you respect her boundaries, however, you wish she could talk to you and if she needs you, you will most certainly be there. If she fails to respond, leave it. She seems like the type that will come around eventually.

  • Take care and focus on yourself.

    Since she is the one who wants the distance, you need to respect her. You also need to protect yourself in case she is "playing games". (I don't care how unlikely it seems, some people do this to test someone else.) Send her an email, text, whatever and let her know the ball is in her court, so to speak.


What Guys Said 1

  • I say wait a little bit long, maybe like a full week. Wait till the weekend and maybe send her a message like "i know you want to take a break from talking but I just want to say I hope you had a good week and enjoy the weekend". Don't necissarily send a message that she can respond (or has to respond) to just send a closed one but a nice one and DON'T expect a reply. If she doesn't reply it's not the end of the world. If she does reply that's another story. If she replies try to just feed off what she's saying, don't unload a full conversation on her unless she wants one.

    Other than that just give it more time, its only been 4 days and heck this could be good for you as well, you could use some time away from her too. Don't worry, she'll come around.