I am a very happy person with friends and family and make people laugh a lot, but I have never been in a relationship. I always thought it was because of my weight, but even after I lost it all not much has changed. I talk to girls when they talk to me, and it's so scarce that if I start up a conversation with a girl (or try to) everyone falls silent as though they are eager to hear what I have to say for the first time. I then blurt out what I was going to say with a mismatching tone/expression that makes everything really awkward. I have never dated. The longest conversation with a girl my age that wasn't family was probably 3 minutes long. I'm not shy, but I don't understand my fear. As a result I am extremely lonely and am afraid I will die alone in a basement or something.
Is there any way to simulate companionship? I need to curb my loneliness before it starts reflecting on my exterior. I can't afford therapy and my family isn't an option. Please, anyone, help...
Most Helpful Girl
Hi there. You sound like me when I was around your age. Loneliness is not a good feeling. I've been there. It sounds a lot like you are not comfortable with yourself and who you. I know this sounds cliche but you have be able to love yourself for who you are or at least start the process before the things that you are stating you do not like begin to change. In order to do this you have to be willing to be uncomfortable and push yourself into things that you probably wouldn't normally do. I'm sure you've heard the saying that you can't do the same thing and expect a different result. Throw yourself into a hobby you like to the point where you meet other people that do it also, this may lead to girls, if you are in college throw yourself into clubs you would be interested in develop friendships with girls first so you get comfortable talking to women in normal conversations, you may want to try online dating where you are probably better at expressing yourself through text than words in person, etc. The key is that in order to change things you can't continue to do what you do now. Change one thing at a time and take it from there. Don't hesitate, before you have the chance to think about tonight find a local gym, tennis club or something you like that wouldn't normally do, if money is an issue there are things like local leagues, free clubs etc. Just do it. Hope this helps. Wish you the best.2