I've been with my girlfriend for a year now. I am really good to her (gifts, attention, chores, spend time with her family, very agreeable: I make a big effort because that's who I am). Anyways, we are both 25 and party to some degree (drinking, a bit of drugs... nothing crazy, but weekly for her and occasionally for me). However... She goes out to her guy friend's house to listen to him (and others sometimes) jam on their guitars and supplies them with coke (they're all unemployed) and stays over there until like 9 am or noon the next day... She was doing this before I met her so I never asked her not to, though I told her I won't stick around very long if she continues to stay out THAT late (3 or 4 am is okay with me)... so would you put up with that?
Perhaps though, supplying them with an expensive drug while giving me trouble about every dollar I spend (on the ocaisional fancy beer or car part) is a bit of an issue.
Most Helpful Girl
awe dude.. No way haha.. The way I see it is you have been together for a year and you seem to be great to her and her not so great to you.. IT comes down to three things
1. It bugs you period.. So she should be putting effort in stopping just for the sake of not wanting to make you feel that way.
2. She sounds like she may be addicted and needs some help. So try and help her but don't be a push over about it. Coke is a very powerful drug and she is probably not even aware she is addicted to it in the first place but if she is getting defensive and acting like you are "attacking" her and you really did say it how you say you did then she's addicted.. I watched my cousin go through the same thing with the same drug and he reacted the same way first defensive and upset then he would say he would stop and never did... She doesn't want to face it so she is for lack of a better term using you. And when I say that I truly don't think she is doing it on purpose but she probably wants to keep her addiction and you.
But now I'm rambling so finally 3. If you try to help her which I can tell you care about her so I wouldn't just throw your relationship away IF she is addicted it will be a hard walk but it will work is SHE is willing to make an effort as well as you are but if it fails and she isn't willing to try then say goodbye.. You have to think to yourself is this who I want to mother my children, is this who I want to marry, and is this something I can deal with for the rest of my life and when I say this I mean the person she is being right NOW so no answers like "well yes it is BUT" there can't be any buts.. Its a yes just how she is or its a no.
But I really think helping her is the best or at least trying to help her before its to late...