Do you really have to "Chase" girls?

Is it possible for a guy to prepare himself in a way that makes him appealing to girls - such that in any given chance encounter, the girl will feel compelled to act, or at least it would only require minimal effort to the guy to achieve his end goal (however he defines it)- because he had put in all the hard work before-hand?

eg. Good looks, Physique, Money, Sense of Humour, Important Friends.

Hmm does that make human beings very predictable sexually?

Ok obviously this is an anonymous question.

Updates:
Hmm it looks like we have taken bimodal views of the issue:

a. A group of people say men don't have to do any chasing at all.

b. A group of people insist men have to do the dirty work all the time.


I think in practice, the chances of a guy needing to "chase" the girl probably lies on a continuous scale, rather than a discrete one. It probably has a normal distribution too, so that some men need to work harder to chase the girls and others less.


There, are we all happy?
So basically what I'm trying to say is, you can improve yourself in a way to bump yourself over the tip of the hypothetical bell shaped curve into the upper side of the spread. It would also imply that if you somehow worked your way one or 2 SD above the mean, yeah you'd be in pretty good shape with chicks.


How you like my nerdy answer now B*atches? It's called revenge of the nerds. Bookmark it. IT'S COMING!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Be at least 5'8". Have a really good face and good fit body.

    I've been called pretty boy, and referred to as "the son with the pretty face" by mother's friends

    Never asked a girl out in my life and don't plan to.

    I wear 2XL shirts at work so my pecs don't show or else girls get annoying.

    Looks matter. People are lying if they say they aren't.

    My brother is more fit and taller than me and dudes hit him up randomly. He straight.

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    • Wow you speak the truth annonymous user. Just give it to me - the dose of reality I need.

      Please add me as friend, I would love to pick your brain have your opinion because I am not physically, geneticaly, aesthetically near your level so please do a good thing - tell me what I can do to overcome my genetic insufficiencies. Wait I am anonymous too.

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    • Only responding because you're rehypothecating a theory based on answers from a small sample size which wouldn't make your conclusion, well conclusive.

      You point out a bimodal distinction when you only offer a question that has a bimodal answer. That is called dichotism..

      I'm going to tell you the real answer and that is the graph for your assumption is not a bell curve normal distribution as you think. It's an exponential curve.

      100% of girls will go for top 10% vice versa.

      pretty =/= dumb

    • refer to your original question

      "Do you really have to "Chase" girls?"

      The answer is no IF you have money/looks or status.

      Any guy can get any girl but he would HAVE to chase her if he doesn't have any of the above

What Girls Said 1

  • Be well groomed, polite, approachable, and to answer your title question...YES you have to chase girls! Girls want to be pursued and seen as beautiful, sensual, and charming.

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    • I see. So girls want to feel appreciated, and this can only be demonstrated by the man initiating contact to demostrates her beauty and good qualities. Conversely, if a man does not initiate contact, the girl may interpret this as a lack of appreciation for how beautiful, sensual, and charming she is.

      And you also point out, that without the hardwork laid down before hand, even if a man should pursue a girl he would be inevitably doomed before he started.

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    • I don't know what you mean by chase. You should not play games & act uninterested in her, if you are interested. but what do you mean by 'chase'. simply getting to know someone, is perfectly fine. otherwise its fake. you don't _know_ this person, why would you be chasing them, unless you're psychotic.

      anyone casing anyone is demeaning, imo.

    • Wow your conclusion is a soothing one - a decent man can usually pursue the woman of his dreams successfully. How I yearn for this clarity in my state of mind.

      And also the self-esteem explanation hit the right spot too.

      You have much more experience than I.

What Guys Said 6

  • Let's put it this way, improving on things like the stuff you listed will increase the odds that a girl will chase you, however it won't increase them by much.

    Even by just looking on this site, you can see that "most" girls just don't really believe in approaching guys. They can think a guy is the coolest things since sliced bread but never make a move. There are a few reasons for this.

    1. They're old school and think its against the rules for a girl to make the moves.

    2. They think it makes them look slutty or desperate

    3. They have too low self esteem (just like a guy).

    If a girl is really hot, she will increase the attention she gets 10 fold. If a guy is really hot, he'll only see a slight increase in the attention he gets. At the end of the day, looking good is always a good idea, but as a guy, there is really just no way for you to sit in the corner, look handsome and expect girls to line up in front of you.

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  • Update: That's one way to put it. Simply put, being more attractive will increase your odds of girls approaching you, but its not a night and day change. If anything it just means you don't have to work as hard.

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    • I think it makes logical sense - we can't change what our parents gave to us - we can only hope to maximise ourselves in terms of physical/emotion/intellectual/social attractiveness, and hope for the best. Afterall, we cannot control what females think - relationships are two way streets, it's not just what you want. BUT, I'd max my chances --> which max my confidence, and just go out there and WRECK SOME HEVOC! (in a good way I mean).

  • Ridiculously handsome men will have women chase them, the rest of us will need to work at it.

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    • Maybe the ridiculously handsome men have done even more work than us?

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    • Yes I agree some men are more physically fit for mate than others, and this gift may be genetic and inheritable. They are like the Eisteins of sexual prowess. Damn it.

    • Yeah you would think! But I didn't inherit any of it from my dad, one of those ridiculously handsome guys. A cosmic joke on me lol.

  • I mean all things you've mentioned helps yes, but overall the initiation to approach girls is what does it. Human behavior is somewhat practically predictable if you ask me.

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  • unfortuneately yes we do

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  • No, not really.

    The guy has to make the move. That's how it is.

    And it's self-selective for the girls, since any guy who can't or won't make a move, is not the sort of guy that the girl wants to be with in the first place.

    There are several of these small hurdles, involved in getting with a girl. But these hurdles are enough to weed out the real losers.

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