Why does he disrespect me and put me down so much?

When we met 3 years ago I had a full time job. Then we kind of ran off in his truck and traveled for a year. After that, we got our first place together and within 2 weeks I could no longer travel with him (because of his boss). that's when things startedgoing down hill. I was so depressed that I literally NEVER got to see him and he was very jelous of what I was doing even when I did nothing! I learned to seclude myslf and just went deeper and deeper into depression. We have broken up 3 times but always got back together. This last time we broke up I had finally found a job and was semi happy for about 4 months but when I left I lost it. now I came back and we moved out of the apartment and are staying with a family that are our "friends". FOR NOW. Crazy thing is... when we aren't together we get along so great. but when I come back to him everything goes back to "normal". Every day he puts me down saying I have no job, its HIS money, blah blah but I have had unemployment ad do everything he doesn't have time for, clean, laundry, errands, pay bills, shop for household items, look for homes, etc. I am going to be starting college in December and have had 3 job interviews just this week! yet he tells me I sit on my ass doing nothing all day. He says he loves me but all he does is make me feel so so small. so disrespected and so unappreciated for all that I DO do. Yet when we werent together he was "lost without me" and "realized how much I did". it doesn't make sense? I'm trying but one minute he may acknowledge it but inevidably he doesn't care.. he continues to put me down. what do I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Very simple. Leave him.

    I don't know what goes on in his head. I would be only hurting you by half-assing some "diagnosis".

    But get this trough your head. You have no right to expect him to change. You do not need to, nor should you be raising your partner in love. He is suppose to compliment you, not depend on you. His begging after he screws up is just s bad as the a**hole behavior. He is dominating you in this way. But if he isn't also caring for you and protecting you, what the f*** do you need his dominance for?

    You can stay, but ONLY under the presumption that you are ready for a life of constant humiliation and conditioned "love". Don't expect "love" to change him. He does not respect you, therefore he can not be influenced by you in any way. Don't delude yourself with fairy tales of the power of love. Just get out.

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What Guys Said 2

  • That's becouse you like it.

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  • He puts you down because he has no respect for you. Get away from this guy.

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What Girls Said 1

  • stop playing house. pack up your things. swallow your pride and go back home. get on your feet and forget about him, and never look back. People who tear us down, should never have access to our lives.

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