Is a random "Where are you?" text from a guy you're hardly dating at 9 on a Saturday night weird? Was I wrong?

I'm talking a straight up, plain, "Where are you" text with no, "Hi :)" or "Hello" or "Hey, what's up!" Just "Where are you"...tf!

Here's some background. We ran track together. Two years later, we're both in college. He goes to school and hour away and we've only seen each other a few times this year because he's training hard to be a Olympic runner. He's an extremely attractive, muscular athlete with a killer smile who's broken many track records and has a lot going for him. Here's why I'm having hard time being into him: HE IS SO PUSHY, FORWARD, AND ALREADY SHOWING SIGNS OF CLINGINESS and he's not even my man yet! D: Major turn off! We hung out Sunday and he defensively had a talk with me about how he's not trying to date me so I don't have to tell him to chill, slow down and let us take our time. Yet that same night, he wouldn't stop bringing up stuff like "Why aren't we dating?" , "What if we were in a relationship with the distance", and forcefully insisted on kissing me not one, not two, but THREE times before I left! We had plans to hang out the next day, but I got called into work and I was way too exhausted to walk all the way over to his place to watch movies.

I texted him that day asking when we could reschedule; he never replied and didn't wish me Happy Birthday the next day.

So today, at 9 p.m., he texts me...

Him - "Where are you" (yes, no question mark)

Me - "...what?"

Him - "Where are you" (no, seriously, NO question mark at all!)

Me - "What the hell. Random!"

Him - "Really wow I as jus (no T) askin my sorry (?) I text u" (yes, coming from a junior in college)

Me - "Well you never replied to my text earlier this week, you didn't wish me happy birthday, and you randomly text me "where are you" with no "hi" or "whats up" or anything at 9 p.m. ...the f***?

Him - "Ummmm sorry, my phone was off plus I didn't even know it was your birthday. Ay you need to chill" (you hear that loud beeping? That's my bullsh*t detector. We're friends on FB, I'm sure he got a notification.)

Me - "Chill? I'm just explaining why texts."

Him - "Noo my phone was off please dnt come at me like that. Cause I'm not the one trust me" (yes, no punctuation as a 20 year old and a text threat for no legit reason)

Me - "Bye."

I wasn't in the mood for his macho bullsh*t/anger problem. Little do you know, he has fought a girl before and gets defensive over the tiniest things. I don't like the way he talks to me. He sometime says "Woman!_________", Oh, f*** no!

Anyway, your interpretation of this convo? What do you think? Was my tone too aggressive or something? Or is he just too senstiive and a tad bit weird?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think he's a complete idiot! It's not too uncommon for someone who's very deep into sports...

    You see - that lack of a simple "Hi" in the beginning is a sign of disrespect, when you don't say that and start pushing demands right away in the face - it's bad, it's really bad, there's no way someone like that will treat you properly.

    I could understand why he was upset when you didn't want to go out that time but you had a legitimate reasons AND you offered a re-schedule, that was done correctly.

    When a girl blows a guy off but doesn't set a clear date/re-schedule, then yes, only then it's a sign of no interest.

    The rest what he did was.. I don't know, he's probably emotionally immature or still haves no idea how to talk to girls.

    You're better off without him.

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What Guys Said 2

  • He just wanted to start a conversation.

    Then you come, expecting too much out of a guy when he's not even your boyfriend and then over interpreting him. You attack him aggressively and then tell him to chill.

    I wouldn't like that either.

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    • he's the one who told ME to chill and said "I'm not the one, trust me"

    • Me - "Chill? I'm just explaining why texts."

    • I wasn't saying "You chill" I was saying "Chill?" like 'you're telling me to chill/calm down? I'm just explaining my texts"

  • Well it kind of sounds weird at first, but he was just checking if you were free I guess.

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    • aww, maybe I did too much?

      btw, thanks for reading it. I know it's long,but I appreciate it :)

What Girls Said 1

  • He sounds controlling, run away! I've put up with guys like that before and finally learnt my lesson. Hope you catch on faster than me ;)

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