Is it OK to date two guys at once in the early stages?

I'm going on second dates with two different guys. I think I like one more but I wanna test things out rather than just picking one. After how many dates should you pick just one? And is it absolutely necessary to tell them? That would be a fun conversation...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's OK in my book, but no more than 2 or 3 dates. I wouldn't mind being in a situation like this. You don't need to tell them about the other guy. Just tell them what you would any guy you didn't fancy after a couple of dates.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Depends. What do dating mean? If it means exclusive relationship and you date two guys than you don't actually date anybody and are just lying to them.

    I think it is all right to go out with two guys you like and they know you like them more than friends but with no lying and no misunderstandings. Make it clear that you are still thinking about it. And in that case you don't have to tell them about the other one if you don't want to. But don't let them think more than it is true. Than it's all right to do this as long as you (and them) want to. So don't call it exclusive it it's not. Don't call it dating it they don't understand that it does not mean exclusive to you yet.

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  • I don't know. Personally, I can't do that. If I'm interested in someone, I'll date them until I can decide whether or not it's something I want to pursue. If I decide it isn't, then I end things and move on. Usually only takes a couple of dates anyway.

    The benefit for myself, is I get to do things without other outside influences clouding my judgement. The benefit for them (even if they don't know it) is security in the fact that I'm seriously attempting to gauge the relationship, and not just "playing the field".

    Honestly, I think if you're dating more than one person at a time, you're not ready for a stable relationship in the first place, and you need to make it clear to the people you're seeing that you're only interested in keeping things casual.

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  • Would you be OK if a guy you were dating was dating another female?

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    • I wouldn't like it obviously but I wouldn't assume we were exclusive unless it was stated, but maybe that's just me...

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    • Do you not think if a guy is only seeing you he'd tell you/ask to be exclusive? Otherwise you can only assume.

    • Assuming is something no one should do, and if someone you're dating has to say something to get your undivided attention, then why are you dating them in the first place?

  • It's preferable not to do it, but as long as there's nothing physical with either of them, you have all the rights to choose without guilt.

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  • I would mind a little bit, but yeah it's ok.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Absolutely. You haven't committed to either one, it's very early, and you don't know enough about them to even pick one over the other. By forcing yourself too early, you could end up ditching the guy who would've been a better match for you. I also don't believe you need to let them know unless they ask, as that is pretty much assumed due to the fact that you've not had the exclusivity talk. I do think after a few dates though, if you want to get serious with one, you cut out the other guys. People will be understanding in the very beginning (they're probably doing it too), but after that, they'll start to feel like you're playing them or aren't very serious about them.

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  • I think so if you have'nt commited yourself

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  • A friend of mine in college did that, dated several boys at once and didn't tell them. It's how she narrowed down the herd in a hurry.

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