Should I Consider Him My Boyfriend?

Okay - so I've been seeing this guy for about four months. We are both really into each other. It seems that we try to one up each other sometimes so I talk about my guy friends, he talks about other girls, etc. It drives me crazy. But I do it too, so whatever. And sometimes I think he's inappropriate, or maybe just stupid - with the things he says and does around other girls - BUT he always tells me about them. And I don't get that upset because I feel like we are not boyfriend and girlfriend and he can do whatever the hell he wants as far as I'm concerned.

He makes jokes about "not being sick of me yet," and he made some comment a while back after I said something about "Oh I usually go out with guys..." and then he said, "Who says we're going out?" which I wasn't sure if that was a joke or not either. But because of that I assumed we weren't "going out" and it was just a casual thing.

ANYWAY - Up until now I thought it was just like, whatever whatever - we like hanging out and we're having sex. He says nice things to me all the time, like that I'm special, I'm beautiful, like really "wow" things sometimes, sometimes so nice they make me uncomfortable. I have met his family and his friends so they all ask about me and stuff.

Well, the other day he was helping me set up something for a show I was having, and this kid who was talking to us asked us if we were going out, and he said yes. And then he said, "Well that's what I think, I don't know what she thinks." And I ignored it, assuming he was just jealous of this guy, thinking it didn't really mean anything. And then he brought it up later - and made a joke about it and was like, "When so and so asked us if we were boyfriend and girlfriend I should have been like, 'um, that's an extremely personal question.'" And I didn't say anything. And then he brought it up AGAIN, the same joke. And then finally I said, "Yeah, but he didn't ask if we were 'boyfriend and girlfriend', he asked if we were 'going out'." And then he was like, "Oh is that what he said?" And then we didn't talk about it.

I mean, if he's trying to drop hints or whatever, I don't understand why he was never just like, "Hey will you be my girlfriend," or whatever. So now I don't know what the hell is going on. I mean, I don't want to come across as daft but... if it was never made official how do I know whether or not he's seeing other people and how do I know if I should NOT see other people? And at this point I feel like it's just super awkward to talk about it with him. So, any opinions would be greatly appreciated.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Should you consider him your bf? Well only if you talk with him about it.

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What Guys Said 1

  • You really just need to have "the talk" with him and make this relationship official. It seems clear that you both want to, but have both been afraid to do so. So get 'er done!

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What Girls Said 1

  • Both of you should talk about how you want to define the relationship.

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