How can I stop being so scared of losing her?

Okay, I'm heading off to college in two days and I'm leaving my girlfriend behind. We're still going to be together because my college is only two hours away and coming home on the weekends is fairly easy. Why am I so scared of losing her? She's homeschooled as well. Please help me. I don't want to constantly have the fear of losing her because it adds tension onto the relationship. I want us to work out. I know we can actually. I just need some ideas from people who know what they're talking about.

Please don't give me that LDR's don't work out bs. They do.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Some LDR's work, some don't, depends on the people in it and the effort they're willing to make to maintain your relationship. I bet she's scared of losing you too. You're going to a new place, meeting new people, meeting new girls, ... you know. I doubt she'll feel comfortable at first.

    It's just a while you'll feel weird and scared of losing each other.

    You're leaving in two days, just make it the best two days together, go off to college and maintain contact. There aren't any tricks and tips to stop certain feelings.

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    • I mean, I'm trying to make the most of it but she can't spend time with me today because of her parent's supposably. She also told me she wouldn't see me off at college because it'd be too much. I think I'm over thinking things though,

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    • She was originally going to come with my parents and family and say there goodbyes at my college, help me unpack, etc. Now she says she can't because it would be too much; emotionally.

      You see, I asked her if we could spend time tomorrow and she basically told me that she would try and see if I could come over. I know her parents, and they've never turned me down before. They helped me "sneak over" at midnight once for her birthday. What should I do if she says we can't hang out before I leave?

    • Call her and try to see her. You could always stop by if she's home, even if it is for 5 minutes. Even though, if you're coming home in the weekends, it might not be as bad and hard as you think.

What Girls Said 4

  • It takes two people. =P and if she really wants it to work and you really want it to work then it will. But they are very hard. Finding time for one another and making each other feel involved in one another lives is challenging as well as being intimate with one another. I suppose it depends on how much attention and love that is required to get the two of you by so your needs are met emotionally and physically. I would suggest you would talk about it so you know where you stand with one another and try to work things out and try to get time in where you can. Calling, messaging, Skype, and seeing one another will help a lot. Hope it helps

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    • Thank you. It is going to be hard, that's the first thing we've acknowledged. She's agreed to call me as much as possible which is something I brought up after reading about LDR's. We also plan to Skype often and text every day. At this point, the intimacy aspect scares me. Yes, It'll be amazing when we see each other.. but I worry about the days and weeks where we don't. It's scary to me.

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    • Thank you so much! :)

  • There is only really one way, you have to let go of your insecurities.

    She's your girlfriend and you have to trust her that she wouldn't do anything, and you have to make sure that when you are there you guys have a good time, don't let silly thing become big problems, if there was something you need to apologize for, don't wait til the next weekend, things like that.

    Really it's all down to you, you need the confidence to ignore the insecurities your having about going away and leaving her and only really you can help yourself with that.

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    • Thank you, now.. how would you recommend I give up my insecurities? Like, how do I do that.

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    • Thank you so much. You have no idea as to how much this is helping me.

    • No problem, wish you all the best.

  • I'm in the same boat as you, except I'm the one leaving my boyfriend behind. Just take it a day at a time. Though, I do know that gushing out all your fears to her at once is a bad idea because it will freak her out.

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  • Two hours apart and she's home-schooled? Really, what are you worried about? My situation is about the same, I'm home three days a week and can see whoever I want, no issues.

    If you both want it to work, it will. You have to let go of your insecurities.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Many reasons for being scared. None of which are worth being scared over. Once you believe that you're Gods gift to women (in a respectful way)... you won't worry about losing a girl again. You will just say to yourself...Oh well, her lose...and move on. You have to believe that your're just as special as you think she is. Only worry about what you CAN control. You can't control her...so sense in being scared of the unknown happening.

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