Thoughts on my boyfriend's text? Is it final?

My boyfriend stopped talking to me for 9 days and yesterday morning at long-last I got this text from him, I have no idea what to feel, I want to cling on to any sense of hope, I want to stay with him more than I could ever want anything in this world..

'Sorry for the long period of idleness. It's just that I've been thinking about us and all that. I just don't feel sure if it'll work out and if maybe we should just stop fooling ourselves. I love you, Jess, however I'm not quite sure if our relationship can work out given our circumstances.

Maybe it could work out, maybe it's better if we start viewing each other as friends or just stop all of this and carry on.. I don't know.

What I know is that I'll never find a person who feels as right as you..

I love you, Jessica and I just want the best for you.'

What does he mean by 'stop all of this and carry on', carry on with what, from where we left off? I have no idea.

Any thoughts, opinions, advice etc?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with what's being said by the others BUT I find it terrible how he thinks he can say such serious stuff over an sms! C'mon guys this isn't fifth grade, we're not ten year olds! Considering it's a long distance thing well at least have the decency to call or Skype. This is sad you need to talk about it and get the closure you need. Sounds like he's tired of the relationship not you so don't take it personally:) chin up,this sucks but at least he's honest. It may hurt now but talk it over and see how it goes. You'll be happy with him or someone else soon enough! Not that we can't be happy on our own too:)

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What Guys Said 4

  • First, what is going on that caused him to send this?

    He mentions "circumstances" and you said it took nine days for this message to appear.

    Details please.

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    • He went incredibly, distant, cut contact with me for 9 days, I assumed he just needed some space, so I gave it to him and yesterday he sent this message.

      Uhm, the circumstances are this is a long distant relationship.

    • LDR's have a high rate of failure, so I can't say I'm surprised by his outlook. It's probably best that this ends. The two of you can part and find people more closer to your area to build something with.

  • carry one means you go separate ways - completely. no talk, no text, no chitchat, maybe 'hi' if you bump in each other.

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  • Is it final? I think it is.

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  • It is completely over. He's trying to break up and make it final without being nasty about it. At least he doesn't seem like a jerk about it, he's just trying to let you down easy.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think it's final. He wouldn't talk about options if it was final. Maybe you need to talk seriously and try to resolve any issues you may be having. Then come up with a solution and a way forward from there.

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  • I have no idea what he's saying because he's not clarifying his thoughts, rather confusing it even more.

    What circumstances is he talking about?

    From carry on I thought he meant break all contact and carry on with your individual lives.

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    • He can't mean carry on in that way can he really fml? I've been there for him for the past year, he's always there, I always need him, we have grown so much together.That is shattering to hear.

      The circumstances are the distance between us.

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    • You'd definitely need to ask him what happened to his plans with you (meeting up with you) before you let him throw in the towel. I'd wonder how commited he was when he said that or perhaps circumstances changed and he rethought but he should have mentioned that to you when he thought about it, if there were any chances to that thought process and all.

      If he wants to break up with you, he needs to give you a reason because HE HAS A REASON, if he refuses, this is a situation you learn from and

    • you move on immediately. You do not hang around a guy who cannot or refuses to communicate.

  • It'f final. He sent you this text because he still cares for you and he feels bad leaving you in the dark. He only mentioned options because either he's too afraid of completely breaking up with you and breaking your heart, or he wants to use you as a back up plan if he hates being single/can't find another chick.

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