If he's interested he would ask me out again, right?

Im new to the dating world. I focused on my studies so much that I never really met anyone until now that I really liked. We went on 3 dates so far; 2 ended in us making out. In between those 3 dates I had to travel for 6 weeks and he kept in contact.

Well I asked him a few days ago if he was busy this weekend. He said nope and asked if I wanted to hang out. I said sure but I can't on Sunday night. I didn't get an answer after that.

Now its Friday and he still messages me randomly but no date. I have a strong feeling we're not going to meet up, but he still compliments me and texts me as if nothing was up and we had no plans.

Is it true that if he is interested he would jump at the chance to set a date up? Or is he testing me? Help please!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • With the making out by the 3rd date I think you've rushed far too quickly into the relationship. Let me explain.

    If you wanted a long-term relationship with this guy, you should've treated it like as if you're cooking something. As we know things can only cook properly if the lid remains closed on the cooker and you got a good heat coming from below. Your having sex too early has sadly shall we say 'taken the steam out of the pot' or the 'wind out of the sails'. The relationship now pretty much rests on him.

    Also you haven't given enough time either for him or yourself to figure out or work out the differences between you where you're going to go with this. After all, in his eyes he's only known you for 6 weeks.

    A possible solution to this? Don't anticipate the next meeting is going to involve sex at all (it may not come for some time in your current stance), but rather try to build up the heat between you again by doing things the both of you love. Try going to the movies you like to see; games you both like to watch; places he's always wanted to visit etc. Keeping and creating that bond through shared liked interests will help create the spark that you both need.

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    • We didn't have sex mind you, we just kissed heavily with some light grinding. But yea, it did feel rushed. A part of me wonders if that's all that it was, despite each 'hang out' or date lasted 4+ hours (most talk with only one kissing.)

      I wanted this hang out to be something more akin to a date admittedly; going out and actually talking with no make outs. Maybe mention that I miss going to my favorite hang out and ask if he wants to join me?

    • Err coffeeshop hang out! Not make out spot!

    • Coffeeshop is fine, but probably only good for meetings on weekends.

      A better suggestion would be to go out for a walk in the park or zoo. Or even better

      go join a theme park. I think theme parks are much more fun in getting to know

      the other person because you don't know what's up in store...

What Guys Said 3

  • If he was REALLY into you, I think he would have asked you out. Some guys try to play "cool" and not seem too eager, but his inattentiveness is unlikely a test of any sort. YOU could try to initiate a date with him if it's not against your dating rules.

    There is always the possibility that he has other things going on that he didn't mention.

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    • Test because I know he dated some psycho hose beasts before me. Left one a few months back in fact though it was a short relationship.

      If he did have something else then why say no and ask to hang out? Argh.

  • just ask if he wants to go out

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    • But I asked him indirectly if he was busy, he said no and asked if I wanted to hang out. I said yes but can't on this day. He never got back to me after that but still texts me like nothing is wrong.

    • Because nothing is wrong. You want to go out? Great. He wants to go out. Ask him what day works for him other than Sunday, or whatever

    • You made a very good point actually. I just thought that a guy would push for it too.

  • Stop thinking about it and just try asking him again. Then you'll know

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What Girls Said 1

  • Well when guys are interested in a girl they usually ask them out , but some guys are shy and don't like to tell you he likes you . If your really into him ask him out and see what he says , don't worry if he says no that just means he not interested and you can move on knowing that he was into you or never into you . I hope this answer helped :)

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    • But I did ask him, sort of. He asked me to, we just never set plans and he never mentioned it again. We already went on 3 dates with 2 make out sessions, how much more does he need? D:

    • Ask him to be his girlfriend . If you've went out on dates he defiantly likes you , just say to him " I really like you and we've been on enough dates for me to say this , I like you and I would like to be your girlfriend cause you really mean a lot to me " or something in that range.

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