I caught my boyfriend of one year texting his ex girlfriend for pictures?

Saturday we went to his ex girlfriends going away party for the navy. Me and my boyfriend always had the trust thing about not getting jealous. Monday morning he can't stop texting. He picks up his phone when he received messages right away except when I was cuddling with him or leaning on his shoulder. After awhile he preferred I didn't cuddle. As we were headed out today he realized he forgot his phone and asked me to get it. And against my own morals I checked his messages. He was asking the girl for sexy pictures. She said no because she knew he wasn't single. But he told her come on, at least your top half (her breasts are much larger than mine) I confronted him later when we got home. His excuse was it was a stupid question. I really don't want to leave him I love him and I know he still loves me. But I told him he can stay at his brothers tonight. I feel like I'm making a huge mistake


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're not making a mistake.

    No matter what, he was deceiving you. He was disrespecting you. He was disrespecting the other girl.

    He may love you. Many here will tell you he's a cheater and he doesn't, but he may indeed love you. What is a fact is he does not respect you the way he should, and he either needs to learn how to do that or leave the relationship. He needs to find a way to earn back your trust. He has hurt you deeply, and he needs to make up for it.

    How you go about this situation is your decision. I would advise you to essentially break up and see how he handles it, but this is your life. I don't have to deal with the consequences.

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What Guys Said 4

  • he was kinda cheating on you so it's okay if you are reacting to the situation. Either he should be sorry for what he did or he is making you fool. And you didn't do anything wrong by checking his phone. Obviously if everyone can be trustworthy only by saying it then whole world will be a lot better place or I don't know some freakshow.



    Situation is weired. It's not a mistake that you asked him to stay at his bros. let him be there. He was probably doing some flirting and he might get over it. And I guess he does love u.

    If you want to keep things going on with him then show your natural reactions. He should realize his mistake. Don't talk to him about that incident anymore. And let him call you first from his brothers. If he won't then I think you should find someone else. He made a mistake so least he can do you is to call you ask you to get back to live together.

    Take care.

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  • The only mistake you might make is dismissing this and looking past it. Should you dump him? I can't say. But he should absolutely be on thin thin ice and I wouldn't think you would be at fault for leaving him. It is rough leaving a person you're in love with and as a guy, I actually kind of understand why he's doing what he's doing (I can't explain it but I understand) and, at least if it were me, I wouldn't even consider dumping the girl I'm with for the girl I'm asking for pictures. Just because he might not leave you to go back to her (or maybe he would but he just doesn't think his ex will take him back) doesn't mean it isn't wrong and doesn't mean it isn't a form of cheating

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  • This is a tough one. Should you leave him? Not necessarily. Are you making a mistake by sending him to his brother's for the night? No.

    Remember though, BOTH of you broke the trust boundary.

    1) Looking at someone's text, email, etc without their consent is a major violation of trust. It's their property, what gives you the right to do that? You would be just a furious if he did the same thing to you.

    2) On the flip side, of course, him texting an ex for nudes is inexcusable. He knows EXACTLY what he's doing and on top of that offered one of the most pathetic excuses I've ever heard.

    Ultimately, you're both culpable in this situation. Major breaches in trust have occurred, and now you two need to sit down and honestly talk about it. If you don't think you can trust him again, then call him off. Trust is a huge foundation. If you listen to any of this, at least take this bit away with you: try and and exhaust ALL options before breaking up, or else you'll regret it.

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  • "It was a stupid question"

    Hahahahahaha, oh my f***ing God I haven't heard a lame excuse like that in a long time.

    Thanks for making my night. Next time I ask a question hinting at sex and a girl gets offended I'll simply say: "Sorry, it was just a stupid question... So, still wanna make out?", PAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

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What Girls Said 4

  • You're not. Can you *imagine* what he would do if he found texts like that on your phone!? Asking an ex boyfriend for pictures of his penis? You'd be single by now without a doubt. His excuse was extremely lame too. Trust me, you can do better. If you forgive him this time, be certain it will happen again because he knows he can get away with it.

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  • I would consider this as cheating and if I didn't wanna leave him for this at least I wouldn't talk to him for a long long time.

    If he asks for pictures he would ask for sex too... no? Tell him would you be upset if I asked my ex boyfriend for a picture of his cock? Meaning am not satisfied with yours so am asking to see the bigger one and am reminiscing..

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  • Hmmmm, you just got to know your boyfriend a little better. You like what you see? I hope the doubt you are feeling is about the prospect of investing more time, emotions and sanity on this dude. " love" has little to do with it. Use your brain it will not stir you wrong

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  • A stupid question? That boy should be begging for forgiveness! Love doesn't conquer all and as much as it hurts you will be way better without him in your life. Even if he promises never to do it again or whatever the trust is broken now and it will never be the same.

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