Is he still interested in his ex?

This is going to be really long, please bear with me. My boyfriend and I have been together for three years this month. Before we started dating, he had a girlfriend for about three months which ended right before we met. I literally mean like a week. Anyways, she is really really pretty, not to say I'm not, but she's just one of those girls. Since we have been together, he's always been a little bit secretive of her. I recall one conversation where I was upset over something regarding her, and he asked me, "what? Are you wondering why I would leave her for YOU?" that's stuck with me a long time. There were also times he would be on the phone with me, and texting her! They'd text super long texts back and forth to one another, and he would barely be talking to me. Then, when he and his family went to Disneyland, (she lives in LA), he told his cousin he was going to go see her and not tell me about it. Although he didn't end up going to see her (as far as I know) it still bothers me that he would even say that and be dishonest about her. Two winters back, she came to town for Christmas break. He and I made a plan that I would go to her house with him so that I could meet her and put my feelings at ease. Well, the day before we were supposed to go see her, he started acting weird. He didn't reply to any of my text messages for a few hours, and when he did reply he told me he was at her house. I called him upset, and he was acting really distant. He told me he didn't want HER or her family to feel weird meeting me. Now, why their feelings about the situation matter more than my own, I'll never understand. there have been multiple times he has been texting her, and would erase parts of the conversation so I couldn't see. Last year, I made a mistake of going to hang out with one of my guy friends without mentioning it to him. He got really mad because the guy used to like me, and I knew. However, I knew he had a new girlfriend so I thought nothing of it. He texted me a few days later saying he missed me and was having a hard time not kissing me. I didn't know the visit was like that for him, so I just didn't respond. Well, my boyfriend went through my phone and saw that, and got EXTREMELY angry at me for it. He told me it makes no sense since me and him didn't hang out that much except for at my other friends house, yet he says him and his ex only hung out a handful of times. I get very upset over her, because he makes her seem so important. Let's fast forward to this weekend. Friday night, we went out to dinner with my family. He was messing with his phone so I glanced over to see what he was up to. I saw her name under his text messages and mentioned it to him, but left it alone because it would be rude to have that conversation at dinner. Later that night we went to ice cream and while we were there she texted him again. When we were leaving, I had his phone and his friend texted him. When I opened his text messages..

Updates:
I cllicked on the one he had with her. (I know it's bad to snoop, but we both do it). He had erased his entire conversation with her, so I wouldn't read it. He told me he did this so when he opened his phone I wouldn't be seeing her name and getting upset. I don't think that's the truth though. I asked how their conversation started, and at first he said he texted her to say hi and see how she's doing. Then he told me that he was going through baseball pictures and found a picture of them
took a picture of it and then sent it to her. I went through the pictures with him the night before, but he waited until I was at work to take the picture and send it, then delete it out of his phone. To me it seems he was trying to reminisce with her on old times.. Then we were sending out invitations on Facebook for his birthday party, and he didn't invite her, but the next day while I was working he went back and invited her so that I wouldn't see it. THEN, yesterday I was being nosy, and..
and while he was showering I went back to their conversation. He had texted her first thing when he got to work, when he didn't text me. & she didn't reply, so six hours later around 3:45 he sent her another, trying to keep the conversation going. He didn't do any of this though until I wasn't around, so to me it just seems so sneaky. I didn't even hear from him again until 5PM, after he had come home. I asked him how he would feel if I was doing these things with my ex (we don't talk at all)

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What Guys Said 1

  • wow you wrote a lot shorten this for us , then will respond.

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What Girls Said 1

  • so to answer your question: yes. Clearly.

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