I think I was just abandoned....

Me and a guy has been talking online for over 6 months, just casually...but he's been wanting to meet me for a while and possibly become something more. It took him a while for him to get me to agree to meeting him because I was afraid.

Well we agreed to go to the movies today, we met, got our tickets then as we were going into the screening room he said that he had to use the restroom...so like a fool, I picked out seats and waited for him to come back. I remembered that I needed to put my phone on silent, and that's when I realized that I had a text message from him, saying that there was an emergency and he had to go...I just wonder why he sent it in a text and not tell me in person. But I'm sure that it was an excuse to blow me off...Why would someone do that? It almost ruined the movie for me and now I feel depressed and hurt...I'll probably never know if there was actually an emergency or not...

(BTW...Frankenweenie was a really good movie)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Seems there was either no emergency or the emergency was so bad and urgent (in his mind) that he had to text you... but to be honest I think there was no emergency.

    Now he may not have done it cruelly... he could have been really nervous (I get terrible social anxiety and I think some people can be sceptical about it, but there are people who get so nervous, nauseous the works).

    But to be honest, he made it to the date, and all he had to do was sit in a dark screening room and enjoy the film. It's a pretty good place for a first date, especially for nervous people.

    Maybe he isn't actually single? Maybe he changed his mind about cheating on a hypothetical someone else.

    But then... maybe he's one of those insensitive guys who will ditch a girl all too willingfully for whatever reason ranging from (too boring/quiet, not putting out, doesn't seem like she'll put out, not as hot as I thought/expected). Sorry to be so up front about that but some guys will think like that. I'm sure you're not boring and for what it's worth I think you're pretty. At least you enjoyed the film, objectively.

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    • it was just that, he was the one who kept asking to meet me, and I was the nervous one and ept objecting, but when I finally build enough courage to meet him...this happens. I'm pretty sure that he didn't leave out of nervousness, he didn't even look nervous. Another thing is, I'm disabled. But I've told him about my disabilities before and he seemed interested and kept asking questions about it, and he said that it didn't bother him. I can't help but feel like that played some part in it.

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    • I just read up on it, sounds pretty nasty. Sorry to hear (so to speak lol).

      Seeing as you shared I think it's only fair to reciprocate. Mine is a mental disability. Not that rare really, (a load of people quite probably have it and don't even realize for one thing). Aspergers.

    • Oh OK, one of my friends has Aspergers

What Guys Said 6

  • He just didn't like what he saw, probably had the wrong impression from pictures and conversation. This happens a LOT with cyber acquantanceships, you know! And also in real life, some guys just get REALLY cold feet.

    Don't be depressed, he might just not be able to handle a real life encounter. Maybe he's so shy he resorted to cyberdating as an introduction.

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  • Maybe he just got scared and didn't want to risk screwing things up (though if that's the case, he kinda failed hard)? Maybe he really did have an emergency? It's not very nice to say, and I hope it isn't true, but maybe he changed his mind about you :/

    To be honest though, it's hard for anyone here to say what his motives were as we don't know what he thinks or the relationship you have. You have to speak to him if you want to know.

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  • well it seems he was very immature... I am sorry that happened to you.

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  • You try texting back and seeing what was up? Messaging him? Calling him? Talking to him? If not, then this panic attack is a little premature. Some emergencies require immediate attention, like you don't even get to finish zipping up your pants kind of immediate. Maybe you should get his side first.

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  • lol love that you threw a mini movie review at the end there.

    yo just ask him what the emergency was. ask him what happened, where he went, how long it took him to get there, then ask him details. keep asking him again later as if you forgot what he had said, if he changes his answer, you know he lied.

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  • Has he seen pictures of you before you met? If it was a real emergency that was that bad, then he would have not had time to go and tell you in person. Have you talked since?

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    • yes, he's seen a bunch of pictures of me, and no, he hasn't contacted me since...

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    • The movies been over with for over an hour and a half...if he want's to contact me, it probably won't be until tomorrow

    • If you talked for 6 months and he waited till you were ready and he knew what you looked like then I imagine it was a real emergency. Just ask him what happened tomorrow, or maybe he will contact you.

What Girls Said 2

  • =( awww I'm srry to hear that. First reaction is of course, what a jerk. lol. but maybe there was an emergency and you could talk to him and ask him what's up but yeah that did sound like a brush off and if there wasn't an actual emergency then he's most deff a jerk and he didn't have to do that and he could have at least stayed for the movie. But at lesat it was a good movie =)

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  • I'm sorry you got blew off by him. I don't think you deserve that.



    to answer your question the possibility could be endless. Take it as a learning lesson and move on.

    I'm sure there are plenty of other nice guys out there who want to be with you.

    Cheer up. :)

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