Help! I think I have pride issues! (I'm a guy)

I always hated getting turned down, even if a girl had other plans and wanted to reschedule, I would not follow up with an alternative date because I would hold a grudge with them for having an initially negative response to my advances.

Recently, fooling around with a good friend (female) she wet further than she had ever with a platonic friend (we made out and I felt her up before falling asleep in the same bed, cuddling) and we while both agree that things would ruin our friendship, I get upset with the tentative decision and she can see that too.

In fact, while dating, I keep multiple women interested in case one is flaky, or decides to be 'hard to get' or whatever, so that I may get my mind of things by going to the different women. THIS IS WRONG AND I KNOW IT. But I don't know how to stop, I think therapy would help but I am ashamed to approach professional help.

Any ideas? Did things like this happen to you guys ever? How did you tackle this?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm going to say it. And I truly apologize if this comes across negatively.

    Yes you have too much pride! People come and go, people get rejected. It makes them no less of a person. You are giving up on people way too easy and you're holding grudges, which can completely ruin you in the long run.

    You obviously feel troubled by this, and there is nothing wrong with going to see a therapist. Nearly everyone has seen one or talked to one in their life time. Doesn't mean they are broken.

    As for the women you put on the back burner. This works for while with some, but eventually they get impatient and feel rejected too. (Is this sounding familiar?)

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What Girls Said 2

  • yea too much pride, it seems like you expect pple to drop everything to be available when you want to be even if it is a small issue like rescheduling.

    therapy is good and I dnt know what other services are offered if your ashamed to go, you might have to get over your fear, might have to face it.

    be careful, those different women may come back to haunt u...ur out shopping you c one girl and then you turn to see 5 more talking to you to say hi lol, then they all meet lol

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  • F*** therapy. 'Wo is me' that is something you should be able to control on your own...

    it's probably that you've been hurt or let down

    Obvs aren't ready to date

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What Guys Said 2

  • It's not wrong to have multiple prospects unless you are committed. Girls do it all the time so it's not wrong for guys to do. Both girls and guys can be flaky. It's a sad reality. The "hard to get" ones disqualify themselves because they're too childish for a relationship as it is.

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  • Man I'm like you. I think I have too much pride as well. ITs either me or nothing. Even when my girlfriend have plans with her friend. I tell her to drop it and come with me. If she tells me no then I would be mad at her for days.

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