Is he trying to rush into a relationship with me? Is this normal?

So there's this hot guy I met threw an online dating website (he's actually hot ex: we're both in the top 10 profiles that are checked out for our age out of thousands of locals).. He stated to text me and ask a lot of questions and has been trying to be playful and get to know me days before meeting me and still after meeting me.. This threw me off because most guys my age don't do that and don't really want a relationship even though they claim they do.. Well he really likes to get to know me and after our first date he wanted to take me out the next night too (this is NYC on the weekend guys never want to spend all of their free time with you this fast)! He hasn't tried to do more than kiss and hug also and we spent half the weekend together so he isn't putting on an act just to get with me.. I went onto the online dating website the morning after date one and went to check his profile (he has my number) and I found out that he disabled his profile and took it off the dating site.. I think he did it because he likes me (he was on it for a while ex: he asked me out two years ago but I wasn't over my ex or ready to date back then so I turned him down). Is it normal that he disabled his profile right after meeting me and wants to see me again so soon?

He asks me odd questions like how I see my future and what I want to do before I die and sends cute silly texts.. He told me that he looks forward to having a family and doesn't get why most guys look at like it's their death.He also told me that he is picky and personality is really important to him (I am def in the 99th percentile when it comes to personality among attractive women and that isn't me being cocky it's a fact). I online date because I'm picky by the way & he's not trying to date for sex...
Forget that he is hot for a second.. because he's also corky in a way that most women prob wouldn't know how to handle.. I'm the type of girl that a guy who does want a relationship falls for & I don't sleep w/guys I date unless they are basically my boyfriend.. But this guy wants to see me again soon & knows that I'm going to my parents for the week which isn't far from his works & he want's to take me on a date while I'm visiting home.. basically meaning that he would be OK w/meeting my parents!
is it strange that a guy wants to go on 3 long non sexual dates with in a week of meeting.. Might meet my parents for a few min and I think he terminated his profile right after he met me! Is this normal? No one mentioned that he might be clingy or isn't being misleading I'm just not use to this.. Last time a guy was like this was my ex and that didn't end well


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think its being very prejudice to put "hot"people into categories or motives, eg, a "player.: Yes it happens alot, but sometimes that is not always the case. Maybe this guy is shy or just simply does not have any luck approaching women, despite his looks. Give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he's had bad luck with women and along comes this girl that has qualities he is looking for. Since you have seen him and seen that he is real(not a fake profile), just enjoy the time you two spend together. Do I think he might be rushing into things? Yes,he is moving pretty fast, but again maybe he is just eager. BUT I would keep my guard up, get to know him a liitle better to see that his motives are pure.

    • Thank you.. and it sounds like you think the way I do.. I think that there's a reason why most people end up married & that's because everyone wants to be loved for who they are by someone they feel the same about.. I've had hot boyfriends before.. My ex is VERY hot & he's also the most insecure guy I know. This new guy grew up in a divorced fam w/a dad who was a player.. He hated it and doesn't want that for himself.. He wants a fun big fam & what he didn't have.. that can make him the one out of 10?!


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What Guys Said 5

  • It's an online dating site so it's rare that people click. I've met many girls over time and most of them flat out flake or play games. Disabling profiles should be talked about in my opinion but I would say it could be good or bad. He could be rushing too fast or things are just going really well. That's really up to you two to decide. Just talk about it with him and see if you are comfortable.

    Thing is, it's a dating site, so there are intentions of a relationship from the start. So it should not be a surprise that things are leaning towards commitment. There are people on the site who will outright tell you from the start that they are looking for a relationship.

  • He's defintely showing all the signs of focusing on you and seems serious. Of course, a really serious guy woldn't be on a dating site, it seems to me...but that' s just my opinion. And he's been after you for, what, more than two years? Olbviously you are physically very attractive!

    As for cockiness, you sound like you're at least a match for him!

    Consider that he knew you'd be checking his profile, though...And he's presumably been serial dating on this site for more than two years, and who knows on what other sites...and there are other sources for dates! He might just be a super player, right?

    • lol I am anonymous so I'm letting the cocky show haha..& He has no idea I checked his profile.. I didn't think it would look good on my end to tell him I checked even if he didn't get rid of it I have my settings set so that people won't know when I see their profile.. It's J-Date so it's half serious.. I know a bunch of people who married who they met threw it.. I've also been a date with guys threw it that is def gay and in the closet! I'm smart & asked him about his experiences on J-date

    • Show All
    • Best Answer, right?

    • wrong he actually does really seem to want a relationship lol... He doesn't have the best family set up and wants to have his own family, openly talks about this and wants to do things differently.. so far he's showing the most signs for wanting a relationship out of all the guys I've dated in the past two years .. I also have 3 cousins who met there wife/ husband on online dating.. He has no idea I'm checking his profile.. He even met my fam yesterday lol.. & I'm not as cocky as I am a realist

  • It sounds like currently he likes you. I'm not sure if its normal: some guys like relationships and others not so much. You may as well give it a shot if your interested.

  • Hot guy on a dating website = Player

    Hot woman on a dating site = Most likely seeking emotional validation and free meals

    When someone is way too good to be true, most likely it is because they have motives. Think like a really hot guy, not a woman for a moment. Men like sexual variety and the men most likely to get that are the really hot ones. I'm an average looking guy. If I was super hot, I certainly wouldn't have a girlfriend, I'd try to get as much as sex from as many girls as possible. Average looking guys settle for relationships because it is the easiest way to get regular sex. Think like a hot guy and then you'll realize why this guy is single and on a dating website.

    • I get what you are saying but forget that he is hot.. he is talking to me non stop & canceled his profile after meeting me which is crazy? He wanted to spend his Saturday night in w/me getting fro yo & renting a movie.. W/no intentions of anything more than a kiss and cuddle..He actually didn't try to make the movie into a make out sesh & didn't use a movie as a cover to try to rush things.. he wants to see me while I'm at my parents house this week.. Meaning he would be OK meeting my parents!

    • He could have just disabled the profile as a ploy. I had a girl tell me she deleted her profile when she just hid it. After going out on a few dates and not offering to help with the tab, I saw she re-enabled the profile. You seem to be moving really quickly, really fast. Slow it down and see if he's fine with that. Slow, slow, slow if you're going to prove wrong how most of these guys operate.

  • The hottest guys on dating websites are there for casual 9 times out of 10. It is the average looking guys who are looking for girlfriends more often than not. The hot guys can get lots of casual sex because they know they are in demand. Don't be shocked if he pushes for sex quickly. I told you so right now in advance. Keep that mind.

    • I already dated enough of the hot guys and I know you are right.. I wasn't born yesterday lol.. I can just tell he is being dif.. ignore that he is hot because he doesn't really act like he even knows he is.. He's being really attached and I think he went off the dating site after going on one date with me, is that weird?

    • One date seems mighty fast, unless there was a real connection. Just go in with your eyes wide open. I have plenty of male friends that are really hot. Great buddies, but I would never recommend them to female friends for a relationship. The hotties are poonhounds more often than not. If he doesn't push you quickly, I'd be shocked, but good for you if he beats the odds?

    • LoL my dad was a hot player.. It's pretty gross.. He even dated an Israeli Penthouse Pet of the year and she took him on Vacation.. But he's been in love with my mom for 27 years & is a great guy.. I know I'm in demand & he knows I get asked out a lot so I take more work than most women do at first to get that first date. I'm single because I don't want average lol & it's why I've made up rules for sex. He told me that he's only single because he's picky, & that he gets so pissed at his boys who cheat

What Girls Said 2

  • He may just be focused on you for right now and isn't interested in looking or he is getting lots of mail and doesn't want to deal with it

    • well I sort of asked him after date one, do you usually do all of this? I'm not really use to a guy wanting to be this connected this fast unless they think they want a relationship but then they don't and I really am over that ( I said it nicely).. he was like I always make sure not to lead women on etc. I grew up in a house of women & I did have a player faze back when I was a teen but I'm acting like this because I really do like you & your personality a lot! then he wouldn't stop hugging me lol

  • I agree with the boys, he is probably out for sex. Listen to the guys they are guys and they know what is happening. I would be cautious with this fellow. But it sounds like your are level headed and mature. You know what you want. Just take it slow, time will tell if he is being a great guy, or a big jerk.