Or do you think its an individual thing?
- GuysVote A
- GirlsVote B
- Depends on the personVote C
Most Helpful Guy
If a girl was to walk into a party, look at hundreds of guys, and come out not interested in one of them. Why? Because women's attraction is about like their orgasms. It takes a long time to build momentum.
As such, I would say girls are pickier at first. They could walk around and be attracted to a minority of guys, while a guy could walk around and be attracted to the majority of girls.
In terms of who they would sleep with, girls are also much pickier. It seems like a common stereotype that men would sleep with anyone, while women have "standards". But the fact is, girls aren't nearly as aroused by appearance as guys.
For them, most of the fantasies are action-based, and actions don't quite come through in appearance, meaning there is very little instantaneous attraction.
Not to be confused, however, with judgement by appearance, in which girls are just as guilty a guys. Mr. Stud muffins could probably go up and smack a girl's behind and she'd be flattered, telling her friends about the flattering compliment she received. But if a nerdy looking guy goes up and says "I like you" he's suddenly a predator, and she goes to warn her friends about the "creeper", which is at least as stigmatizing as the word "slut".
Also, it seems like girls run on "I'm not interested in you until you prove you're attractive", and guys kinda have more of a "I'm interested in you until you prove you aren't attractive." (Which appearance tends to do quickly if there are obvious problems.)
Even the male "ideal" versus female "ideal" is harder for men to achieve. Muscular is both more expensive, and requires extensive workouts and precise dieting. Thin has more to do with the ratio of calories taken in to calories used. The reason the women's ideal is a bigger deal is that women are judged by their appearance for things that aren't even related, like competence and intelligence.
Now, take all these things and place them in American culture. We are obsessed with being loners, calling it "independent", and we're more afraid of physical contact and closer relationships.
This means that most girls don't know as many guys all that well, which is necessary for building attraction with women. So while guys are turned on often, girls are rarely turned on. Which is where you get the stereotype that guys are mindless sex slaves and girls are the ones with "standards".
You go to Europe, in more closely-knit communities, and this isn't quite the case. In Sweden, men and women approach each other about as often, and American girls stand out for expecting to be wined and dined by their boyfriends. It's also common to have sex after the first "date". In the Netherlands, it's common to have sex and THEN consider having a relationship.
When people are closer with each other, men's and women's libidos become more balanced, and lots more sex happens.4