Would a good first email to send to a girl online consist of: Hey how's your day going so far? Would you like to chat sometime?

To all the ladies out there who online date or have tried online dating...Would a good first email to send to a girl online consist of: Hey how's your day going so far? Would you like to chat sometime?

  • Yes
    59% (47)33% (16)50% (63)Vote
  • No
    29% (23)44% (21)35% (44)Vote
  • Hell NO!!
    12% (9)23% (11)15% (20)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • as much as it seems like it should work, I mean the polls say that women think so, but that's only because for some reason women feel the need to appear a certain way to us guys even when we will never meet them, "yes of course we want them to offer a simple nice message like can we have a chat"

    truth is the message is clearly saying that your interested (in this context) and for some unknown reason when a woman finds out your interested it goes pear shaped from there.

    Apparently we have to engage in some sort of hidden message bullsh*t where we have to make them WORK OUT if we are interested.

    Thats bluddy great saying that us guys tend to be bad at it. women lol

    if I were you I would say something completely random and interesting, a bit like those stupid funny pictures on Facebook. That way she will click to see better if you are actually as interesting as you make out.

    Noone can be obvious with girls even when its a dating site and the entire reason your on it is to find a date lol

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What Girls Said 10

  • Err I'd prefer something more personal to be honest. Try finding something in her profile that you can connect with her to, like, "Oh I see that you _____, I used to ______ something something" or just a compliment or something.. "hey hows your day going, just wanted to let you know that I really like your smile. would you like to chat with me sometime?"

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  • You always want to make sure that you have read her profile and connect with something on there. Lead with that. If a guy said what you proposed to me, I'd be like no or I guess (but not interested). Most guys I have talked to online just started talking. The more conversational it was the better it worked.

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    • What do you mean the more conversational the better?

    • Most of the time I've been online I didn't have a clear idea of why I was there. I wasn't really that interested in meeting people. So when a guy starts talking and has a lot to say or can get me engaged in a real conversation, the warmer I would be to him. Some guys are very stilted in their chatting. I feel like I'm being interrupted by them. Either they are not good at talking to people in that format or they are chatting wih several girls at once.

  • You have to really catch her eye. I know if I saw this in an inbox on a dating site I would just think that they couldn't be bothered to think of anything interesting, compared to someone who looks like they made an effort to message me and shows that they actually read through my profile. Pick bits out and ask her to elaborate, show her you have things in common, maybe throw a few compliments in... not too cheesy though and don't overdo it, let it come naturally. Make it an interesting read and there you go, you'll get a reply! :)

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  • I wouldn't reply back.

    But that's pretty standard so stop over-thinking it and go for it.

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    • Would you mind too terribly if I asked why you wouldn't reply back?

    • I don't like talking to people online. I'm not sure why but I rarely ever do unless I'm in a certain mood. Maybe I'm mean but I have nothing against anyone-I just don't like it.

  • depends how well you know each other sound creepy if a random stranger but otherwise yeah fine I guess

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    • How does that sound creepy? I'm just asking her if she would like to chat sometime.

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    • I'm sorry but If I or she wasn't a random stranger then why would I be asking her if she would like to chat? Or am I not understanding what you are telling me?

    • just chat with her stop over thinking it

  • I think you may be over-thinking this.

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  • No. Try "Hey, nice profile. Would you like to meet?" or actually reference something that she's posted online so she knows you've read it.

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  • Introduce yourself a little too

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  • something that limited might set off "pervert" alarms

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  • Is there anything you can do to make it more interesting and less generic? Mention something you know about her from her profile, something you have in common, etc.?

    I used to use OkCupid and to be quite blunt, I got a LOT of messages that were exactly the same, the whole "what's up"/"how are you" thing doesn't make me want to talk to someone because I already hate answering those questions in real life too, haha.

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What Guys Said 5

  • It's actually not a good message.

    It's very unoriginal. Thousands of guys send email like "hey, whatsup" or "how are you" or "wanna chat" to women. Now, imagine you are a woman opening up your inbox, and there are 30 new messages. 10 of them are going to be sexual pervert messages. And probably 15 of them are going to be those boilerplate unoriginal messages. She is going to look into the few messages that are actually unique, and may not even look at the profile of a guy who said the same exact thing that all the other guys are saying.

    Also, women know that guys just copy and paste a generic message to 50 different profiles. Women want to know that you took the time to look at their profile. So write about something they put in their profile. Make it an open-ended conversation with emotion, humor, wit, etc.

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  • I voted B. Not C, cause that's a bit harsh. But there are definitely better ways of starting up a message with someone you wanna date. You're talking about online dating, so they'll have profiles. Why not say something specific about their profile? That shows that you're not just interested in their picture, you're interested in who they are. Comment on something you liked or found interesting in their profile, even tease them a bit about something in a nice way if you want. But I'd say you do want it to be a bit more interesting than just "How are you? Let's talk sometime." First of all, it's kind of awkward to ask someone how their day is going when you don't even know them - friends ask each other how they are, not strangers. (You wouldn't see someone go up to a random person and start a conversation with "How are you?" unless they were really inexperienced with talking to people.) Second off, like I said, you want to show that you're actually genuinely interested in getting to know them. People don't wanna just get to know anybody. People want to get to know people who spark an interest in them. Show why you have that interest in them.

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  • Boring as f*** dude.

    I wouldn't blame the girls for sleeping on that message. It's not like they're desperate to talk to you and you're finally offering them the chance to do so. It seems like bullsh*t curteous uninterested filler talk, and that's what it is. Try something personal.

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  • A text is better

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  • Yeah, that's fine. But spice it up, as 'hey,' isn't original. I like to start with a joke, such as, Do you drink water? (yes) DON'T! FISH HAVE SEX IN IT!

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