How to support a sex buddy in his hour of need?

My sex buddy of 5 years text me saying "my sister in law has just been diagnosed with cancer so I won't be around for a bit x .. I replied " I'm so sorry to hear that, of course you need to be with our family. I'm here if you need to talk x - and left it as that! Now if I don't text him and give him time he thinks I don't care , but if I text him ask if his okay in seen to him as trying to be a girlfriend and needy! - how do I be supportive without knowing what he wants?

I don't want to bombard him with messages but If I don't message him he turns round and says I don't care! How often is okay to text him, without him thinking I'm a nuisance or annoying?


Most Helpful Guy

  • How do you support a sex buddy? Well, I'd suggest next time you make it all about him. Give him mind blowing head!

    • You should only use texts to set up your next in-person meeting. Then you can't be bombarding him. So maybe just shoot him something like, "Hey! Hope you're doing ok! If you want to take some time out for a little FUN distraction this weekend, just let me know! ;-)"

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What Guys Said 1

  • How does this come across as needy. If he wants to talk he will come to you and if you want to listen then respond as like a couple does. Even though you are not dating this is a rare time for you ywo to establish a emotional connection. Be careful either you two get attached or you break up.


What Girls Said 1

  • Just listen and be there