Putting limitations in the dating world, makes it harder! Yay or nay?

I had this whole spiel planned out

and everything. But, then I feel my

point gets lost in translation. So,

the simple question is, why do so

many people put limitations on

themselves when it comes to

dating?

What I mean by "limitations" is

having this extensive list of

looks, personality traits and

all this other stuff that doesn't

matter, that no real genuine

flawed human being could ever

live up to and more importantly

would be quite dull if they did

fit all the unnecessary things on the

list.

For example: Height, weight, eye color,

hair color, hair length, muscle mass,

sizes of more intimate body parts.

Then there's : liking the same, movies

music, television shows, books, restaurants,

types of food, having the same hobbies,

the same likes and dislikes, etc etc.

Also: adding religion and politics to the

mix. Which might enter the category of

values and beliefs, however I'm open

minded person so I never made these

two topics or anything else that I mention

or didn't mention a part of what I look

for in a person. There's things that really

matter and can't be compromised on. Then

there's things that don't matter or shouldn't

matter that much, that can be compromise

if you're both willing to do so.

I have general bases of what's important,

but at the same time I don't limit myself

to specific "type", because I'm just not

gonna do that it's not my style.

So, why do people limit themselves to one

type? And, do you do that? If so why?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't believe in long lists.

    She just has to be reasonably attractive (I find a wide variety of looks attractive/cute/pretty, etc.), has a pleasant personality, a few things we're going to enjoy in common, loves to smile and be friendly and be loyal. Beyond that, you don't need a lot in a woman. Any guy that keeps adding more and more to the list to get a girlfriend will end up being disappointed. Unless you're looking to get married and want someone to be your soul mate for life, there's no need for girls to be super picky either.

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What Guys Said 3

  • It comes down to natural selection and mating. We want a person that is top of all for good genes to be passed down.

    The truth is, you have to approach dating with an open mind and let those who come, be given a chance.

    But sometimes for people who are very picky, it tends to workout for them. When this happens, its awesome and that is why you see people writing books, movies, stories about it. But the chances of this happening is less than 1%.

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  • Oh, my list is simple and short; I must be attracted to her. If I think she is beautiful, like you, then that's my start. Beyond that, it's dating that will help both of us to determine if we are compatible with each other at the personality level.

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  • Of course. If you're strict on things, that leaves less people to fit your ideals and it makes it harder to find a suitable partner.

    I don't have a particular type. I have things I prefer, but I can look beyond most of them. I only have one hang up and I don't see myself changing it. Unfortunately, it seems that it's a pretty big issue.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Eh, depends on what you mean by 'harder.' If someone's that fussy/picky that they're going to make a huge list... well then it probably makes it easier for them. They're likely picky enough that they know they won't be happy with someone who doesn't meet many of their criteria. So why bother dating someone they can't change when they can wait for someone to meet their criteria. It is 'easier' for them to be single then dating someone they're not particularly happy with.

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