My ex boyfriend won't leave me alone...

I had a very troubled relationship with this guy for about a year and 4 months. It started off wonderfully, but he got very emotionally abusive, and on a couple of occasions, showed signs of physical abuse. I finally found the right time to break up with him. I tried to be as kind as possible, but still firm on the fact that I did not want to be with him anymore.

I think he is a deeply troubled individual. I think he is messed up in the head, he definitely has some kind of disorder. He does not see the world accurately, and has a skewed, unrealistic perception of reality. That, mixed with his bad temper, could get scary. I don't think he is a horrible person, I just think he is CRAZY and needs help.

Following the breakup, he continued to text me about how sad he is, and how angry he is at me for "giving up." I ignored him at first, but he kept on doing it. I would eventually get mad and ask for him to stop.

He proceeded to send me drunk text messages all the time, and really long emails about how he wants me back.

I made it very clear that there was no chance for us.

Then, out of nowhere, he texts me a long text about how I am messing with his head and leading him on into thinking we could still be together in the future. This just further showed me how really messed up he is.

After a few more drunk texts, I texted him one day and basically flipped out on him. Now he is showing signs of ridiculous depression and I am scared he is going to hurt himself.

It has been one week since I got mad at him, and I just got an e-mail saying "I miss you and think about you everyday. I wish I had you come over that day, I wish I could change this"

He is referring to the day I broke up with him. I told him I was coming over, he knew it was to break up, and he said "don't come" so I ended things over the phone.

He is hung up on thinking that we would still be together if I went to his house that day.

I do not understand how he could be so crazy. I have been honest and upfront this whole time. I blocked his e-mail and when I get home from college for break, I am going to the verizon store and having his number blocked.

I am scared that he will try to find other ways of contacting me...maybe even start following me around. I am also afraid of what will happen if I see him out at a bar. I KNOW if he sees me with another guy, he would start a fight and might even try to hurt him.

I am scared and I don't know what to do. Please help

Updates:
I forgot to mention I ended things with him over a month ago. The last time I saw him was November 2nd, and we broke up a few days later.

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What Guys Said 2

  • date me and I'm gonna f*cking beat the sh*t out of him ;)

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  • Good call on getting his number blocked. Block any ability he makes to contact you. If he continues to find ways to contact you, give one warning that a restraining order is the next step you will take if he doesn't stop. If it continues still, make good on your word and get a restraining order. You need to take the proper steps to protect yourself from him. Worry only about your own safety. What he might do to himself can't be a concern of yours.

    If he breaks the restraining order, there will be legal penalties. If he's willing to take it that far, you're probably right in your assessment that he is dangerous and the restraining order is entirely justified.

    To be honest, if it's possible, I would get in touch with your parents. Assuming you're on good terms with them, they'll have your back and will help you with taking the necessary steps to get this guy out of your life. That's what parents are for =)

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    • Agreed on all counts. But I would say, don't contact him, even to talk about the possibility of a protective order. Just go ahead and get one.

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