I'll preface this question with ... no one knows me or the people I'm dating so you can only assume but I will do my best to put the full truth forward. I am a pretty, smart, honest, loyal, and upfront female (also, at one time, very successful in my career). I'm now 47 - and am told (often) I look about 32. I exercise all the time and (have also been told) I'm in great shape. I intend to *try* to do an NPC bikini competition next year. So I think I'm a good catch.
I broke up with my last boyfriend nearly TWO years ago. He was a rotten abuser and yet HE found another girlfriend in about 2 weeks (and has continued to have gfs this whole time - perhaps even the same one, I'm not sure) while I've had nothing but trouble.
SEVERAL times over the past few months - after having a successful first and very often second date - I don't hear from the guy again. SILENCE. I even went out with one guy for a month back in September and STILL cannot figure out what happened with him. I thought everything was going fine. The last time I heard from him was a day we had a minor issue about texting versus calling, but it was - I thought - resolved, but when I didn't hear from him the rest of that day I texted ONCE - and called ONCE - (as I am not going to make a fool out of myself) but he never replied. Not even the common courtesy to explain why.
What is it with people - ADULTS - not replying, or just not bothering anymore?
NOW, the guy I went on TWO dates with this week (the 1st date being Tuesday and the 2nd date being last night) just did the same thing - and this was after what I *thought* had been a fun night. There was loads of chemistry (he was all over me last night) and then today POOF! He's gone. No explanation. I've heard nothing from him when EVERY day prior he would say "good morning" or "how are you?"
While he did come back to my house last night, we did NOT have sex. We just kissed a lot. He couldn't seem to STOP kissing me in fact, even seemed reluctant to leave - not getting up to go until 2:30 am. He left and I've not heard a word since - and no, I don't for a minute think he's just busy. If it was important, he'd take 2 seconds to send a text. He sent one every day prior to this.
Is this the NEW way of dating? I didn't notice this trend as little as 10 years ago nor even 5 years ago but it seems people just disappear without a word.
FWIW, I'm not going to text or call him. It is clear he is sending a message. You don't go from texting someone everyday to nothing if you're interested in that person, but ... wow. Makes me just want to give up with the dating.
Thanks for any thoughts or advice.
Most Helpful Girl
These guys that you are pickin are prob just in it for sex and when you hang out w them and no sex then poof they are gone cause that's all they were lookin for and there are plenty of other girls out there willing to put out. Sucks doesn't it? There are a lot of users and bad guys out there. To find a good one is just the luck of the draw. Sounds like you're sorta on the right path tho because you're not sleeping w them right away. They are doing you a favor by hightailin it outta there when you don't put out to allow you to find a great guy. From what you say you sound like a very sexy lady and you are prob attracting players that are drawn to the physical side of you. These guys prob approach you all the time cause they are confident and have many ladies in their back pocket so they don't fear rejection as much as the normal guys. Stay away from these guys and maybe try approaching the shyer guys who tend to be a little more reliable and less full of themselves. Maybe switch up where you are meeting these guys. Ya know stay outta the clubs, bars, etc. Good luck!0