Is it shallow to like girlie girls?

I usually like the really shy, short, conservative and romantic type of girls that are OK with being treated like girls. I like to make the decisions and treat the girls I date well. If a girl doesn't want me to cook for her or pay for her stuff, I feel like she's too independent for me. I'm a big tall, stupid and quiet guy, and usually prefer girls that are OK with me being a bit clumsy and foolish. Bad at talking to most girls, so usually focus on working out and working at my job doing programming or teaching Japanese to these kids, since I lived in Japan for 4 years back during the military days.

Have only had sex with one girl that I dated for 4 years, and we only stopped dating because something really bad happened. It took awhile to accept what happened and try to move on, so I'm hoping to find someone like her again. I just hope I can find another girl like her someday.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd say something is only considered shallow when your main/only criteria are surface-based qualities (looks, money, etc). You're describing personality characteristics as well, so I'd think not. The only problem for all people lies in being able to attract the person you desire. Many set their sights too high, and ask for someone with more positive/desirable qualities than they themselves have. Nothing wrong with it, but you're unlikely to get such a person since we're all looknig for the best we can get. If you feel you're equally matched in some way to the girl you seek, you'll find another girl eventually.

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    • Well I feel like I have a very comfortable style of life to offer my future girlfriend and I'm at least average looking. Always try to treat the girls I date very well, so I'd like the same in return.

What Girls Said 8

  • You have a type of girl you're looking for- and it's based more on personality traits than appearance, so I definitely don't think you're shallow. I also don't think you sound stupid btw- don't be so harsh on yourself, you teach Japanese, that definitely takes some intelligence.

    While I'm the type of independent girl you're NOT looking for, I do know some women who more or less match the description you gave, so they are out there. A word of caution though- don't get so hung up on finding a girl exactly like the one you first dated that you miss out on some truly great women. You're never going to find another girl EXACTLY like her, so don't try. The type thing I get, I have it in my head as well, and I think knowing what you want is good, just make sure you don't discount a girl because she's not into all of the same things as the first one was.

    Good luck!

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  • U like short girls yay! Lol

    Its not wrong or shallow,but if a girl refuses to have you pay for her stuff,that is actually a good sign..

    Careful not to be taken advantage of...I'm sorry to hear bout your past relationship,ull find someone don't worry,uve got a great personality,just keep in mind that you two are equal,u can be the protector,but she has the right to have her own opinions as well...as long as there is complete respect between two people I think their relationship will be just fine..

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  • I could never be with someone like you as I'm probably "too independant" I cannot let a guy pay for everything simply because I work too, I have money, why can't I spoil him every now and then but that's just how I am and I'm not shy. Some girls will love a guy like you but ypu have to be careful that you're not taken as a fool and manipulated. There are girls out there who will see ypu as an easy target and their meal ticket.

    Its not shallow to have a type. The mistake is looking for someone to replace your ex. No girl wantsto be compared to another, especially an ex and you doing so isn't healthy for you either.

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  • It's not shallow at all to have a desired preference when it comes to dating. Personally I'm very independent and shy in nature and I love beautiful surroundings that also includes lots of pink. Being to much of a girlie girl would make me feel like you don't value me as a whole person. I'd have to put on an act for this girlie girl role. Friends of mine fit into this role perfectly. As a friend of theirs I do most of the planning on what we will be doing together when we hang out. It's always been this way and waiting for them to make plans never happens. So I can see why men enjoy this type of personality traits in women. I personally hope I can find a guy who can accept my strong sense of self. You will find someone eventually who fits into your plans perfectly. When you least expect too. Some girls have no problems what so ever with being taken care of in every way imaginable. I'm wishing you the best of luck in finding her one day soon :)

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  • No, not at all

    I think you're a feminists worst nightmare, but there's nothing wrong with that! I prefer a dominant guy and rather be the submissive one in the relationship myself, but I don't go around repeating that because then I'm viewed as a female holding females back in time

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    • Well I wouldn't care what she did before, as long as she was willing to stop having a lot of guy friends and not party a lot. Honestly I can't date a party girl because I don't often enjoy partying. If I go to parties it's usually to drive my guys home and make sure they're all accounted for. They're my favorite rednecks, we all play Dungeons and Dragons together and go shooting at the range. I think maybe many girls don't like it if guys have more nerd interests haha

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    • Pretty much, won't deal with girls that have dude friends just waiting around with their own agenda. F***that.

    • You're pretty much immature and insecure lmao

      good luck with that

  • Nothing wrong with that,you sound like a bit of a traditionalist when it comes to girls and for me that's a good thing to be :)

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  • It's not shallow that's just your type

    I do think you may have low self esteem and look for traits in a woman you won't feel threatened by. It's not a horrible thing as long as you treat the woman you date with respect and don't belittle or abuse her, like some insecure guys tend to do.

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    • I just like feminine women because they'll be kind to children and not argue as much. I think conflict in a relationship is bad.

  • no

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What Guys Said 2

  • Nothing wrong with it at all. I have a similar preference. As long as you are providing someone stable for her to be dependent on, that is.

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    • You live in China? I lived there for a little bit doing some stuff. Not a bad place. Probably better off without the Americana soldier influence heh.

    • Haha! No, no. This is the Soviet Union flag ;D China seems like an interesting place though.

  • Nothing wrong with that at all. It means you're a man who likes feminine women. There are a lot of us men who appreciate femininity.

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