After telling me she really likes me and wants more, she suddenly ends it, what do I do? What CAN I do?

Okay, so I met this girl a couple of months ago at a concert, she approached me, we exchanged numbers, but we never met up, then randomly just over a week ago we bumped into each other in a bar and instantly became acquainted, we then spent most of the ensuing week together. Things were just fun and not serious, yes we both expressed an interest in each other and on the third date she stayed over an we had sex (it was her idea, I was happy to wait), everything seemed right and we both expressed this to each other. Then on Friday she was at work late so I went out with friends and got very drunk, I called her really late after promising to call earlier- I was extremely worse for ware and made a complete idiot of myself- this really pissed her off and she claims to not be able to trust me anymore.

After speaking on the phone the next day we seemed to patch things up and so Saturday night she came back to mine again. We just snuggled and she told me she wanted us to not f*** this up as she see's real potential- as do I, I told her I really liked her and she said the same, we both seemed to be on the same page and when I dropped her home the next morning she passionately kissed me and told me she missed me already when exiting the car.

That was the last time I saw or heard from her until last night (Monday) I get a text message saying she wants to end it before we both get too attached, her reasoning- she feels uncomfortable with my behavior the other night and can't trust me, this has caused some drama and she feels there should not be any drama at this stage (which is common sense) BUT, I can't help but feel she has me all wrong, she is of the impression I am a huge party animal, a crazed drunken lunatic (I play in bands, have tattoos and don't look conventional) However- I'm 31 she is 21 and my partying days are kinda behind me- she wants a sturdy guy who won't mess her around and that is exactly what I pride myself in being, I just gave a really bad impression the other night when drunkenly calling her! My question: what do I do about this? I know she really likes me but I also know she's being very guarded, we have a great opportunity here and I don't want to loose it due to a huge misunderstanding!

I've text her in a non serious way, adding a bit of humour so not to come across desperate, asking if we can talk over the phone, she agreed but said she would call me... that was early last night, still nothing? I don't want to hound her in any way so I've left it but I can't help thinking this is a huge over-reaction and we just need to be able to communicate and level it all out so we can continue with how it was last week?

What can I do? Should I do anything? Does this make sense to anyone out there? Yes I'm aware of moving things on too soon and No I'm not a psycho, just fond a cool girl who seems to feel the same as me, have a lot in common and fancy the pants of each other! It would be sad to let it go like this!


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What Girls Said 1

  • It is easier to say this than to do this, but give her space. Wait a week. Then either call or text, whatever you are comfortable with, and tell her it would be sad to let it go like this and you gave her the wrong impression... Then, leave it up to her. If she calls, great, if she doesn't, it is probably time to let it go and move on...

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What Guys Said 1

  • Once a woman made her mind, it's difficult to change it. You still have a chance.

    You need to change your lifestyle, act like a man of your age, a man brimming with success, not giving off an aura like a huge party animal or crazed drunken lunatic.

    Apologize about what you did, and you're trying your best to improve your lifestyle which can prove rewarding and fruitful if the two of you decided to take things forward.

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