Ladies: I have aspergers syndrome. Would you date?

Would you date a guy with AS? Is it a turn off? Do you become embarassed?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I unquestionably would, if I found the right guy. It is not a turn-off, nor is it an embarrassment.

    In fact, the only person that I am "crushing" on right now is a man with Asperger's. I really worry about making it obvious, though... I don't want him to feel trapped or controlled, I'm uncertain if he even likes me, and he has been a little difficult and confusing to read.

    I looked at your profile pictures, and you're a good-looking guy, too! Find a nice girl, and nothing will matter.

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    • Thanks for the compliment ;). Sooner or later you are going to have to make it obvious or he is never going to pick up on it. If it is not black and white, he is not going to get it. It is a challenge. Most of my girlfriends have not lasted because it is hard to adjust to someone who processes information in a totally different manner. Best of luck to you. You need help, which you are more than likely going too, I'm on here all the time.

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    • It is wonderful to meet you, too, Greg. I go by my username: Arcano.

What Girls Said 13

  • Yes, I would.

    I don't want to jump to any conclusions about you.., so I'm not indicating I know what _you_ are like. only that the symptoms I am aware of belonging to persons qualifying under highly functional autism, tend to have character traits I find very appealing.

    anyways I like people for who they r, which I can't know from one or two things about them. I'm certainly not going to toss out the idea of being with someone because he has AS. he'd probably have an interesting perspective on things. anyways plenty of people without AS are AHs.

    what is your experience with it? in what ways do you think it manifests in your behavior.

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    • My experience with AS has always been my blunt honesty, saying what is on my mind. I have to take the approach, you live and you learn. I have had a couple girlfriends that realized I was way too mature for them. I am ahead of my years. I have an alturistic personaity. I think that comes with it. My experience with it is usually good, just when some girls don't understand it. They think I'm totally wierd.

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    • Thank you :), your making me feel all warm and fuzzy :)

    • lol You're welcome ;)

  • ive never tried it. but I don't see why not. if I thought the guy was sweet, and cute, he would be just as "datable" as the next sweet and cute guy. also, everyone has problems, if you are ready for a relationinship you should be ready to handle another person's problems

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    • Thank you :). I appreciate your honesty and your answer. Maybe you should try it. One of my ex girlfriends (who is still a good friend of mine) said it was the most challenging but one of the better relationships she had. You made me feel great. :)

    • no problem:) glad I could help!

  • I have a few friends with Aspergers and anyone that would say it's a turn off is a jerk. Find a nice girl who was raised right and she will support you when you have an emotional melt down, and let you be alone when you need it. Basically, don't date a jerk! Good Luck! :)

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    • Thank you :). I really appreciate your answer. Your answer hit the main point of emotional melt down. I have unfortunatly dated one jerk. You live and you learn. You ladies are really boosting up my self-esteem. Thank you :). Your making me feel great :)

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    • Wow. My dad has bi-polar. I won't be discouraged. Thank you again! :)

    • No problem :)

  • No. I've had too many problems trying to date a guy with AS and even one with straight up autism. Not dealing with that again. It's not embarrassing. People with AS or autism can be very intelligent. But autistic people can be pretty annoying.

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    • I understand where you are comming from. Aspergers is a very hard for some people to deal with, just ask my ex girlfriends.

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    • Don't feel bad lol. You don't deserve to be treated like that.

    • ur obviously very spiteful

  • i knew a guy with aspergers in high school. he was mean/crazy/a**holeish/weird. it depends on your personal characteristics.

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  • yes

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  • It would depend no how severe it was.

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    • wow that's really mean. you think people ask to be born with it? what if you were born without limbs and no one wanted to date you because of that?

    • Oh my god. Because you'd date someone with autism so severe they couldn't function on their own at all whatsoever. Get off your high horse.

  • sure, as long as you're sweet and treat me right:) My brother has AS too... Of my three brothers he is the best with the ladies! Don't let anything hold you back!

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  • It depends on the individual, because no one person is the same, but sure it's definitely possible. I have a lot of experience with aspies (a couple of friends and a sibling).

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  • Possibly. Even people with Aspergers are all different, so it would depend on the individual.

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  • Nope just sex. No boyfriend/girlfriend sh***

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    • Thank you for your honesty :). I ws a little shocked when I saw your answer, but thank you. :)

  • How do you know that you have it?

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    • professional diagnosis by a doctor.

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    • I actually happned by accident. I was taken to the hospital for an attempted suicide. It was found that I was on the wrong medicine for many years for ADHD. The psychiatrist was an expert on the disorder, it all happned by chance. Why? I have to ask.

    • Because I am socially awkward (self-diagnosed social anxiety), but sometimes I wonder if it's something else because my one "friend" from college implied that I had a social disorder a couple years ago.

  • sure I would, and it's not a turn off in my opinion. It's something that isn't your fault and I would be able to deal with that.

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    • Thank you for your support and honesty. You made me feel wonderful.

    • no problem :)

What Guys Said 6

  • I'm a guy with Asperger's Syndrome. I was actually born with autism (where I lost my speech for a year, and I was completely anti-social and unable to function socially until I challenged myself to improve). Now, virtually none of the Aspergers traits are noticeable in public. I act normal and people treat me normal.

    My thoughts on this.

    1. All Aspie men are different. Some have different Aspergers traits than others. Some Aspie guys are idiosyncratic and quirky in a loveable way. Other Aspie guys are just weird and bizarre.

    2. Aspie men shouldn't tell the woman he's dating that he has AS too soon. Because he would be casting himself in a label, putting inaccurate and unfair expectations on himself. He should wait until they start to become exclusive and have feelings for each other.

    3. While women should try to understand AS as just as possible, tolerate a few mistakes and give him space. AS is not a license to be emotionally absent or a rude d***head.

    Just my thoughts.

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  • at least you've had a girlfriend before, been in relationships, unlike me, since I also have A.S.

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  • hi jonny sins :D:DD:D

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  • dude hit me up if you need to talk. been there done that

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  • how did you manage to get your girlfriends in the first place since you have Asperger Syndrome? since us guys have to initiate everything unfortuneately, there is no way you can be socially-awkward

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    • Lets just say that I leanred to use my social awkardness to my advantage.

  • I would suppose that depends on the nature and severity of your symptoms.

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