Why do men hardly ever approach me or ask me out on dates?

I'm an attractive, smart and funny 28 year old woman. I dress very nice and my hair/nails/toes are always well taken care of. I'm not stuck up or snobby. I speak when spoken to. Smile at strangers. I'm friendly and outgoing. I haven't been on a date since May of 2012. I've been single since 2009 when I broke up with my ex and went back to school. I'll admit I'm a bit of a novice at dating being that I didn't date until I was 17 and I've only had 2 relationships. I've noticed that men will stare at me like they are interested but they never approach me, even after I smile and say 'hi' when I notice them noticing me. I feel like the 40 year old virgin lol. what's the deal?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't know, unless you have a second head your not telling us about, I kinda wish I had bumped into you lol, I can't say I would pass without making a pass lol,x

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What Guys Said 3

  • Have you ever proached them (guys)?

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    • Yes I have. only a few times. it didn't work out. one guy was married and lied and said he wasn't and the other guy started acting like I was supposed to chase him.

  • Most of the time, I'm too stressed/tired/busy/distracted to ask women out.

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  • why would you feel like the 40 year old virgin when you actually aren't a virgin?

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    • because I feel like I'm too old to not know what the hell I'm doing when it comes to relationships.

    • well you don't really need to know what you are doing since you are a woman, you can be a follower, us guys unfortuneately have to lead all the time, and be glad you are not a virgin and since you are a woman you get to control sex

What Girls Said 3

  • Why do men hardly ever approach me or ask me out on dates?

    Possibly because many guys lack the confidence to approach a gal, you're not as attractive as you think, and/or you're nearing 30 and in my observations guys tend to prefer younger gals as in under 25 with 18-21 being the most desired.

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    • Honestly never thought about my looks or age that way. People always tell me the opposite, that I intimidate men because I'm beautiful and tall and I carry myself very confidently. And from what I've been told I look like I'm 22-23 years old. When I do get hit on, its usually guys that are way younger than me. Maybe they are looking for a cougar LMAO

    • You probably do intimidate most guys since you're tall as in my experience many guys have height insecurity. As for the younger guys cougars do have a trend appeal as they're seen as hot yet accessible due to their age which gives the bonus of any relationship being just causal not serious since she's (much) older than him.

  • Maybe there possible catches but your standards are too high.

    I know that my current Boyfriend is the best man I'll ever meet. However, he's isn't the hottest, most stylsh, or successful. But he treats me like I'm the only women in the entire world.

    Sometimes it bothers me. It used to bother me a lot more. Now I accept the fact and we are relatively happy.

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    • I don't think my standards have anything to do with getting approached. Honestly if a man had the nerve to ask me out I'd say yes on the simple fact that he had the confidence to ask me when most men don't.

  • There are some women that just look too intimidating to guys. This can keep them from approaching someone that they find attractive. A lot of the time it's about body language. For example, some girls like to cross their arms and pop their hip to one side. I've been told by guys that that is seen as intimidating. Sometimes a smile just doesn't cut it. Next time, pay attention to your body language. Make sure it's open and welcoming. You never know who might be watching.

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