I've seen lots and lots of questions here on GAG about people asking things that usually combine "money" and "relationships", like:
how are the bills supposed to be payed for during dates?
would you decide to date a person based on their wealth?
is money an important factor when considering people to date?
knowing how to save money is an important factor to look for on a significant other?
would you stop dating someone just because they can't manage their finances?
Would you go out with a poor guy/girl you liked or a rich one that liked you?
would you break up with someone because they don't earn much money?
etc etc etc etc
why is money so important to these people, when everybody, in the majority here, claims that personality is what counts?
is this really an issue people care deeply about?
personally, I have a dream job that won't make me rich, but will make me really happy. I want to be a book editor, in a smal country (10 million people) where reading is not something people do that much. But I don't care, it's what I want to do. I choose that over a enormous house with servants and two cars on the garage.
my boyfriend has told me time and time again he doesn't know what he's gonna do with his future (we're both 18) and maybe he won't have a extremely good job, etc.
I don't really care. I'm all for "love and a small house" (a saying in my country) in these kinds of things. I'm sure will come up with a solution in case we want kids and need to raise our income, and all that. I think that two people can always come up with solutions to their problems if they never stop trying - and I never give up.
why is money of such HUUUUGE importance to people when considering others to date?
would you stay in a relationship just because you two were amazing financial partners?
would you break up with someone just because their financial life was a mess?
summing this all up: how important is money to you, personaly? Is it really a key factor when considering other people for a long time comitment? Explain why or why not, please.
I don't say that money doesn't make things easier, or that living comfortably isn't better than living in poverty. My point was: two people can solve things better than one can. And if you're broke for a couple of months, I believe that in the third things will be easier and you'd have to come up with a solution.
Breaking up over money or getting together because the other has no money problems, or because you've thinked of it and thought they'd be good financial parters, is just something I cannot understand.
That should be secondary. And people should only move together and the liked, after they've discussed this, so no illusions shred the relationship for the couple.
A Realistic View of things... Prevention. And Solutions for the problems that arise.
Most Helpful Guy
When you live alone and are able to sustain your own lifestyle money isn't much of an issue. Money becomes an issue when you feel responsible for someone else and you feel that you have to sacrifice your own needs to fulfill the needs of someone else. For example in times of financial needs, you'll have to give up your savings for the trip to cuba every year for a trip to the nearest park. Doesn't sound very appealing knowing how much you loved those trips.
Put kids into the the previous senario, you'll have to make more sacrifices meaning no trip at all while the financial crisis resolves itself. In these situations, people often enjoy to banter with blame games because there's a money shortage and sacrifices have to be made. Often times couples aren't will try to salvage all they can and leave the situation instead of making a mutual effort to survive the crisis. What do you think Marriage is? It's a contract that two person sign in order to guarantee that the partner won't just run away once sh!t hits the fan.
You asked would you ever go for a poor girl? Yes, only and only if she has skills that might help survive hard conditions. Ex: Cooking skills (raw food - easy to come by = Transformer into Energy) Social skills ( Hey neighbor, we are out of milk this week can we get some, since you have a Cow.) and Maternal instinct (knows where the kids are 24/7 and caring enough to not Scream & Shout about what you already know is happening).
If the woman has poor social skills that's a real killer, for me. (even in dating)
When dating, the important thing is personality; how well do you connect with each other, because what you are actually looking for is? can I live with this person, can I survive crisis with this person, will I be able to deal with this persons behavior in such times. When you're into a more serious commitment such as Marriage, Money becomes the extra added feature on top of all the relationship responsibilities. Money in the case of marriage is there to provide the lifestyle of the family.
For a home to be safe, you need to ensure that all the elements that make it safe are in their best condition. Protect electric plugs for the babies, knife and forks are safely organised (imagine a fork and a knife on a bed), That your laundry is separated clean/dirty simply for hygiene reasons lol etc...The list is long but you get the Idea. You want to build a HOME.1