Is he into me or not?

So I'm 18 and this guy is 22. We met online and have been talking for about a month now . We get along really well through text. He kept asking me to hang out so Friday night we went to a coffee shop for about an hour, it wasn't really a date but rather just hanging out talking. It was extremely awkward. I'm really shy so I couldn't tell if he was into me or not but he kept playing on his phone and being all cocky. Then he texted me later that night and said "goodnight sorry for being so awkward" I replied and said "its OK I think I was more awkward than you" and he said "no you were fine definitely shy though lol it's cute". He didn't text me at all Saturday, Sunday, or Monday and hasn't yet today either (its Monday). Is he into me or not? And also during that hour he Iike didn't really make eye contact, didn't say I looked nice or anything like that. Kinda just acted like he was too cool to be bothered

Idk if I should text him or if I should wait for him to text me? I don't want to come off as desperate and be that girl that doesn't get the hint. But I also feel like if he didn't like me or w/e then he would've never texted me afterward. Thoughts?

Updates:
So I texted him and he replied and he's wasn't short with me or anything we only sent a few texts back and forth but I still can't tell if he's into me or not so I don't know I'm over it.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • he could be shy and he did say he was awkward which probably explains his lack of eye contact. the playing with his phone and being cocky may have been two things. Either he is a bad communicator and like a lot of phone addicted people practices many anti-social behaviors with his smart phone OR he could have been trying play a little hard to get or seem like he isn't infatuated with you (it's called devaluing where you feel like he cares less since he's pre-occupied so you will try and get his attention).

    I think his not contacting you could be a wait and see tactic to see if you will reach out to him. I'm fairly sure he's into since he texted you after the date. You could reach out to him if you feel like you want some answer or to see him again but I don't think his lack of a contacting you really reflects on you

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    • thanks so much for the help! I wish I knew whether he wasn't texting me BC it's a wait and see tactic like you said or if BC he's just not interested haha

    • it just doesn't seem like he's just not interested. he texted you after the date to apologize for his own mistake, you guys get along clearly, and if you look like your pic then your a super cutie so I'm sure it's more of a ploy. It seems like he may just be socially awkward; thus the texting and generally anti-social behavior during your date

    • Hopefully you're right !

What Guys Said 12

  • Hmm, tough to say, it's similar what I went through with the last girl I went out with. He could be putting up the cocky guy persona because he likes you and wants to come off as not desperate, or he could be shy as well which could explain his awkward/rude behavior (no phone usage when ou on the date!), or he's just not into you, which means you deserve a better guy. There's two things you can do: Wait for him to text you as you go crazy not knowing what's going on or you can text him. What's wrong with you texting him anyways? It's a win win: if you text him and he responds positively then great, things move forward between you two or you text him and find out he's just no interested in which case you can relax and move one because you know for sure how he feels, trust me it won't come across as you being desperate. It's better to take a chance and risk being hurt than live a life of what if's :)

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  • If he liked you he'd be texting you now. Honestly, a lot of online people are socially messed up and have trouble having a simple conversation in general.

    If he's cocky and not texting you, he's probably just gonna try and get down your pant by deliberately not talking to you so you jump at the next chance to see him.

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  • Hi, maybe it was just awkward for both of you, and maybe the cocky bit is just his nerves,I am sure he liked you as well as your shyness,which he said he found cute, and as he was the last one to text, just text him and ask how he felt things went when you met, and would he like to meet up again soon, maybe do something together which might help to lift the shyness for both of you, hope this has helped, and good luck!

    regards

    Al

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  • Let him get in touch, make him prove his worth to you, don't chase a man that has no intentions of showing you he's willing to put some effort in towards you as well. If he is into you, he will get in touch,x

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  • He must be really into you, however he's very shy around you.

    His mind is drawing blank, because he doesn't want to say something foolish.

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  • 1. Text is stupid.

    2. Anybody can get along well in text.

    3. Means nothing.

    4. I'll BET it was awkward.

    5. Don't do that again.

    6. Done.

    7. No more texting.

    8. Learn.

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  • He would be OK with sleeping with you, but doesn't see you as girlfriend material. Find another guy.

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  • The only way you can tell is frame the conversation about talking more or maybe meeting up again. Shouldn't be hard to gauge interest that way.

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    • Yeah you'd think but I suck at this whole dating/flirting thing and can never read guys right

  • You intimidate him and he has absolutely no idea how to react. You're pretty and he probably likes your personality too. He's definitely very much into you but he doesn't know how to show it so the whole cocky thing was him trying to impress you as he was too shy to even look your way. Now he probably feels miserable that it didn't go better and is afraid of how you'll react so he just doesn't say a word at all. Typical defense mechanism.

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    • That's what a lot of people are SAYO g but he's like really good looking so I'm not sure if that's it

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    • Ill let you know how it goes!

  • Go kiss him. You'll know soon enough.

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  • your really cute maybe he was intimidated or just didn't know what to say

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  • yes he is into you

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What Girls Said 2

  • The balls in his court, could be he's distracted.

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    • so I shouldn't text him even though he texted and said sorry for being awk?

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    • What more could you do right.. did you answer that text too?

    • Yeah. I said "no its annoying lol" and he said "its fine lol."

  • I would text him to see how he acts. If he likes you and you initiate a chat then he will probably ask you about making plans for another date. If he doesn't respond then you'll know he's not interested.

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