Why do many young adult women feel the need to date thug type guys?

Why do they feel the urge to be rebellious and degrade themselves by going out with guys that are complete tools and thugs? I just can't grasp this concept. Would a guy date a thuggish skank? Hell no. So why would girls essentially do the same thing?

Being a class act means nothing to young women, particularly the attractive ones.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • let's begin with the use of the term "Thug type guys" as a guy who is clearly angry and bitter we can safely assume your opinions are slightly warped, no girl goes after a guy BECAUSE he is a thug, that is not an attractive quality to anyone, if she ends up with a douche bag it's because that douche bag had confidence, looks and charm, you cannot blame someone for being won over by those things, happens to guys all the time,

    no one ever looked at a man with a incredibly beautiful bitch of a Girlfriend and concluded that it must have been the bitchiness that attracted him to her.

    "Would a guy date a thuggish skank? Hell no" sure they would they'd even pay to have sex with one (ever heard of prostitutes?)

    I mean since when did being a "class act" mean anything to young men ever? you guys will screw anything that moves and then gloat about it. almost the entire p*rn and prostitution industry is geared towards desperate horny men...and you're telling us we lack class?

    And finally "particularly the attractive ones."...so clearly it's all about inner goodness and emotional depth with you. it's fine for you to be shallow and be swayed by material things but god forbid a women might just be horny and want a hot guy to have fun with...that would degrading.

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    • I'm not like most guys, that's the thing. I don't sleep around or gloat about anything and would never pay to see a prostitute. I have "room to talk" in this matter. I just want a girl that lives up to her potential of how great she can be, because as a guy that's all I ever strive for, and I'm not perfect, but I still try to be. That's what I want in a girl, and it sucks because it seems like a girl needs to be in her late 20's even 30's now, before she even starts to develop that mindset.

What Girls Said 9

  • Personally I've never had a thing for them. I've only ever dated the eccentric nerdy boys in dress shirts with the sweet personalities. I find that they're more sensitive and their priorities are more in line. They're my personal favorite but they're a rare breed nowadays.

    I've always found thugs to be quite mentally lacking (read: stupid), at least in my school. They walk around in overly expensive clothes swaggering about kind of like the birds of paradise you see on National Geographic. And they only want to talk about weed or sports or f**ing. A few of them are physically attractive with their muscles and whatnot but overall the experience is the same as dating the stupid chick with the fake boobs. I honestly don't understand why any girl would want that unless she wants to screw him for popularity (sadly, this happens far too often).

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    • Agreed but most girls don't have fake boobs lol. But I see your point.

  • Jaded much?

    I think the reason these women date those guys are because they're not ladies. They're tools.

    You're looking at the wrong women.

    You say being a class act means nothing to young women, "particularly the attractive ones". Maybe you're just attracted to women who have no class or sense of class.

    And to be honest, I think that is the answer, because you're so quick to generalize young women, especially ones that are attractive. Which means that these are the women you're interacting with, and are thus influencing your perspective of women. Because the smart, attractive women I know, don't do such a thing. Then again, all of these women are ladies. Not tools like the men you speak of. Those are women I prefer not to associate with - the kind you describe.

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    • Where do I find these girls then because where I come from, they don't exist. All of the most attractive girls date tools and thugs, and yes, even the smart ones.

    • Just don't lose hope. I can't tell you where to find the girls, but they are out there. You may have to explore a bit, go outside your comfort zone. Or have patience. Just don't get discouraged because these girls are the only ones you see right now. This world is very large. Sometimes it's even just about expanding your own horizons to have the opportunity to meet these girls. Anyway, patience my friend. Hope you find what you're looking for. I promise it's out there.

  • You look at women who are beautiful and attractive and want to date attractive women, why do you think women don't do the same? I have to admit, a lot of thugs are physically attractive. Being a class act doesn't mean you're hot and when you're young looks and primal animal attraction matters a lot.

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    • It's not like I'm ugly or anything though but somehow those kinds of guys always seem to be in better shape. My whole argument though is that you should be able to look at the guy and be like, "this guy is no good for me" and simply avoid him. Instead many girls try and play the hero and get f***ed over when they should have seen it coming. They don't call them bad boys for nothing.

    • True, true, but chemistry and attraction can often override logic. Sometimes you don't plan on falling for the guy but it just happens.

    • What if that chemistry is actually a false sense of it? They know how to manipulate you and your emotions. It's sad too because it's gotten to the point where women simply expect it out of all men and if a man doesn't make her feel that way, she's just plain, flat out not interested.

      You can take the good, honest approach and be nothing but truthful to her and upfront with how you feel and these days, all it gets you is rejected, dumped, or laughed at because you didn't manipulate her feelings.

  • I don't date thuggish guys but young girls have a lot of estrogen which throws their logic off and makes them go for strong tough guys. So don't go to hard on the girls that does this. And yes, a lot of young girls really just want to f*** them to be honest. BUT don't think guys don't go for bad girls.

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  • My boyfriend isn't dangerous. Or a thug. But he is a tool and a douche bag lol honestly...it's just a I think he'll get better thing. I thought after a while my boyfriend would want to change. But he hasn't. Now it's been almost 2 yers. And I'm too deep in love.

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    • Why would you go into a relationship hoping someone would change? The other person should be up to your standard already. I'm not trying to sound like a d***, just challenging you with a question and my view is all. Like do you honestly see yourself with a "douche bag" in the long run?

      I'm sorry it just aggravates me when girls come out and say that their boyfriends are "tools, douche bags," or "idiots." It makes me wonder, "does she even like or respect this guy?" Doesn't sound like it.

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    • . I think he respects me. he's just mean sometimes. but he's like that with everyone. I would break up with him but its hard because I gave him my virgintiy and it just feels like I have to make it work now. I'm not pure. I mans gonna be harder to find now. I'm too lazy to try lol

    • Men don't care if you're not still a virgin, that's OK, just carry yourself as a respectable girl and don't sleep with random dudes. Just be the good girl that you are, as long as you're not quick to sleep with guys, whether it's in or out of relationships, you're good.

      Not being a virgin doesn't mean you're a bad girl.

  • Im attracted to thuggish men and I don't have an issue with it. if a woman likes them then go for it. I know lots of guys who date bad ass girls and love them so yes men do the same :)

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    • Maybe "badass" in a good way, not in a bad girl, low class sort of way. There's a big difference.

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    • Sure having a little of those certain traits is fine, but when you're dressing and talking like one and attempting to live like one too, that's a bit much.

    • I agree it is a bit much.

  • Thug guys are masculine and not little feminine princess boys.

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    • So thug = masculine? Sorry but you're wrong.

    • No I'm right. There's either thug masculine guys or feminine guys these days.

    • So you think it's manly for a guy to essentially say "f*** the rules, f*** you" to everything around him? To have little to no decency? To be the true definition of a follower, that only cares about looking badass? Here's the deal, if you're smart, you're going to realize that a real man is a law abiding citizen, that has good values, a strong work ethic, dresses nice, respectful to those around him, and has the strength to be his own person to his fullest potential.

      No, that is not feminine.

  • Because I don't judge, I like a guy who is fun and loves me back.

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    • ...they don't REALLY love you back though. Sometimes you need to judge and know what's good for you.

  • Because when you date them, it isn't rape.

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    • Why in the world would you want to be raped because that's certainly what you're implying?

    • They won't rape you if you are dating them.

What Guys Said 8

  • Guys do the same thing.

    Go for the sluttiest, drug using, alcoholic they can find and screw them non-stop.

    If that is what they want to do, so be it.

    Nice guys bore a lot of girls. It's like they get into a relationship and then say "...what now?" With the "bad boys" they can have tons of drama and she can go back to her friends with something crazy that is going on like how he's cheating on her, etc. Even though she's "hurt," she now has something to go crazy about.

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    • I can tell you right now, I don't want a girl like that. I don't know a single guy that does. I know a ton of guys that bang girls like that, but that's all, and that means nothing.

    • ...and I know many that do and love those types of girls.

    • those types of girls don't meet mama! and men are so simple..if u'll have sex with me it doesn't matter who you are,in many cases the more screwed up the better sadly...

  • Cause theyre stupid. I try to throw in some confidence and some fun cocky humor with my nice guy personality . Some girls really like me and some find me really boring. But they're particular types of women I try to stay far away from. Some girls just don't want a dull guy and some nice guys are dull, but not cause they are nice. They just need to spice up their personality that's all. But some girls date only total douche bags that hurt them and find every other guy boring, especially guy that has any scent of niceness on him.Reason for it is they crave the drama and sadly they like being submissive and get a rush from being taken advantage of and treated poorly. I don't know why, but its just the opposite reaction a guy would have. Those types of girls have little respect for themselves or their bodies.

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  • Because its not essentially the same thing.

    Thugs have power, relative to other young men.

    Power is attractive.

    The end.

    Many "grow out of it" when the less thuggish types finally finish school and start pulling in good money. Then the balance of 'who has power and status' changes.

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  • Biology tells them they'll provide the most genetically superior offspring. The tall, good looks, muscles, and possible fear they invoke in others would be "good" traits to have in a hunter type world. We've just evolved, gotten civilized , and tamed to sew those traits are no longer in high demand.

    My thoughts.

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    • Yeah, I just wish women would "get with the times" so to speak lol. We aren't cavemen anymore.

    • I hope nobody thinks the auto correct on sew was me thinking that's correct usage.

      I may be totally wrong though. But I think that's why they're attracted to those types. I just wish they'd admit it though.

  • Let me guess. You are just being racist against attractive girls who enjoy dating black guys

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  • You need serious help

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    • No I don't. If anything, half of the female gender does.

  • They date guys they find personally attractive.

    If you don't understand *that* most basic fact, I don't think anyone can help you.

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    • There are attractive guys that aren't thugs or wannabes though. That is also a basic fact. It's also pretty basic that thuggish behavioral habits and such are, or at least should be, a turn off.

  • That's what makes their panties wet. They like to say that we think with our d***s, but they think with their genitals too. They're the dangerous bad boy that they want to get f***ed by.

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    • "Dangerous" and "f***" should never go together in the same sentence or situation but for some reason, girls seem to think it's a good idea. The sad thing is, they seem to feel that good guys are more dangerous than the bad boys. I can't ever understand that either. Women seem to be paranoid of good men.

    • You know what's funny about that? Sometimes when guys on here ask about that, girls will say that guys are nice to use them, but they'll still open their legs up for these other guys. It's the weirdest thing.

      That's true in some cases but it seems like they are imposing the habits of the guys they like on the "nice guy" types yet it doesn't deter them from the first set.

    • I know! Their logic is so flawed.

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