Is my being a student a turn off?

I'm in school for a second degree (halfway done) and I'm also in my mid 20's... I tend to date guys who are 26-30 years when their boys and their carrier is the most important thing to them... They are starting to have a good amount of spending money, financial independence and organised time.. I was more on that page before school but my life revolves around my school and it's really invasive of my time and I don't revolved around normal hours although I make myself super available if I like a guy that I'm dating.. Guys always ask me on a first date how much school I have left.. I feel like being a student is holding me back and preventing me from having a normal relationship... I always had a boyfriend until I went back to school but over the past two years I've been in school and my dating situations always end around 3-6 weeks in (I also live alone)...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are only a few concerns I ask girls when I meet them if they are dating potential. That is

    "Where are you going next?" A lot of guys like me end up dealing with messages from girls in their lower 20's and they are just starting school and intend on transferring far off which makes me wonder "Why do you want to meet me if you're just going to move across the US in 6 months?"

    Other than that, you say you're super available so it is not like school is sucking up time you intend to use for dating.

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What Guys Said 13

  • Actually a girl in school is sexy (unless you've been in college for years and years because you've spent most of it partying and not focusing on school). You being in school is not a turn off at all, it shows you've got a direction in your life and you're on the track to achieving it. If any guy gives you crap about it, f*** them you deserve better. I finished college in four years and have about 8 years of school/work ahead of me so I understand what you're going through, dating is rough and finding someone who understands and supports your career/school path is even harder. Keep at it, don't lose hope, and stay focused. You're headed toward great things and you will find someone who will love, support, and appreciate that, it's just a matter of timing :)

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  • I wouldn't say this would limit your pool of dating prospects, but guys do like to spend time with their new girl, so this might be a small factor, but in a whole, your more datable due to committment levels, and the efforts your willing to make, so when you do find a guy who is willing to bounce around your schedule, he's the one you should consider making an effort towards, as he's not needy, just into you like he should be,x

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  • no way! a girl in college is very attractive... someone with brains and goals... I would prefer my girlfriend be continuing her education... after classes get out and work is all done and all assignments get finished, spending a few hours a night together would be just fine... plus you should have new things to talk about every night if you are both active people...

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  • I doubt it. And know a number of late 20s guys who had girlfriend who were students when they started dating.

    When they ask how long you have left, that may be small talk.

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  • I can see it raising complications, but then some people work jobs and are going through graduate degrees and involved with other things. Have any of these other guys specifically told you that school is an issue?

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    • no.. but I just think it puts us in different places mentally I guess.. I don't have as exciting of a life as most people do and I'm not involved with that much outside school like I normally would be.. I may be starting to work at a really cool job while in school... which would change things a lot I think because I would be able to afford to go on trips with friends and would have more pride :/

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    • I'm actually very bubbly, I smile a lot and always have a witty comment... I guess school does take a lot out of me :( ugh only 14.5 months left (not that I'm counting haha)... I feel like working will help me feel more confident (it's a great position within my field for a well known company)... Time will tell

    • If I were you, I'd take the job, but work only as much as you need to. My mother finished what should have been a six-year program in three and a half. Be sure to leave some breathing space.



  • Depending on how long you had left it could be considered a turn off. For myself, it might be an issue if she was in the first year. But at the end of her first year transitioning to second would be less of an issue.

    The main problems with being a student, finances and time constraints.

    Would it not be better to focus on the studies for the rest of the duration. There's many reasons why I suggest this.

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  • Hell no. You're working towards something. That's admirable.

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  • Probably for the same reasons that you don't really like dating guys who are in school.

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  • hell no! haha

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  • Not really...

    It's more of a turn off if it's a guy who's still in school at a late age (like me for example).

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    • I can vouch for that as I have spent a 4 years in college, 2 diplomas, though one is fairly useless, then I waited 2 more yeata to decide to go to university. So I am 26 years old and just started a degree in January...plus I have never been on a date... ever. So you are doing fine in my books, and it wouldn't turn me off if you were in school, and that is not because I am in school now.

  • Seems to be a turn-on in Japan...

    ... Sorry, just had to let that out :/

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  • doesn't matter really, us guys have to have our sh*t together, you girls don't

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  • It might be a turn off to the guys you are going after because they are already done with school and have their life together

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What Girls Said 2

  • This is an awesome question because I am in school as well. I am liking the answers :)

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  • i don't think it should be

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