Do you have problem when you date military?

heres the thing I hate this freakin job that my boyfriend has. with all the excessive work and stress we barely talk in a day. sometimes I feel he just wants me to be his emotional support like his ma Because he knows I ain't going anywhere. I feel I don't deserve the lacking of effection that my boyfriend gives me like if he is not stress he will call and Skype but if he is he jus leaves me and I feel left out. like pls help how to deal with this


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well first off let's generalize this as a problem with military men. It is specific to your man and not necessarily a symptom of him being in the military men. There are plenty of civilian men who want a woman to essentially play the role surrogate mother.

    As far as your relationship goes, based on what you described the answer is simple. You two don't have the kind of relationship you want and that is fair enough. You can either communicate (calmly and respectfully) how you feel or you find a new dude.


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What Guys Said 1

  • If you really want to be with him, you should be a little more understanding. He's in a lot of stress and you're the only person who has the shoulder he can put his head on.

    If you don't want this kind of relationship, then you're always free to find another guy.


What Girls Said 1

  • There is nothing worse than feeling like a guy's mother, I feel with you! Talk to him on a good day, or if there isn't oneit's better to take it on a bad day than none. Tell him HOW YOU FEEL, not what you'd like to happen or what you want him to do. Say that you love to be there for him, love knowing that he trusts you, but also tell him that you feel lost and confused and lonely.

    Then show some patience, but if he hasn't made any effort do do something in let's say a few weeks, then you need to start thinking about taking another option. It's understandable that he's stressed, but if you're feeling like his mother then he isn't giving you any of what you need. And if he hasn't changed after you pointed that out to him, then it's very likely he won't. And you deserve having your needs met as much as he does.