Messaging someone after 4/5 years of no communication

i dated a guy in high school and I want to reconnect with him. first off, its been about 4/5 years we have not spoken/messaged/texted or used any other form of communication. we are still Facebook friends but no interaction at all. now that we are both out of college... I am back at my hometown and he recently just moved back! I was pretty stoked when I saw a status of his on fb saying he has a job here.

i want to message him so badly and just start off slowly saying, how have you been. I would totally do that but there is just one obstacle in the way... he has a girlfriend. they have been together for I guess one and half years. but I feel that since she is going to be in NY or CA, that their relationship might not last that much longer. some long distance relationships work, some dont.

so I want to message him but I think I should do it after they break up (if they do) ...also for now I'm just doing baby step and liking some of his statuses on fb. I'm hoping he would see my name and be like ohh yea that girl I used to date. who knows, he might message me first! (I wish)

so give me some feedback and how I should approach this situation


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What Guys Said 1

  • It seems that you should message him with the intention of being friends.

    Don't indicate or hint that you want something more than that.

    He's already committed, and if you want something more than that, simply wait for him to break it off with her.

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    • thanks! yea since he does have a girlfriend and I want to really message him it would be only as a friend... but right now I'm just being patient and going to wait

What Girls Said 1

  • I would avoid contacting him while he's in a relationship if you're hoping for more than friendship. You could be setting yourself up to be hurt or disappointed.

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    • thanks! yea I do want more than friendship... but I will wait patiently til he is not with the girl. if I can't wait, then I will mesage him but only keep at friend zone

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