After 5 dates, could I text him if I haven't heard from him?

This guy and I have been dating for the last month. We've been on five dates over the span of March, and talked throughout the day every day.

Last week, he came up to my apartment for the second time, which is an hour and a half drive from where he lives. Everything was awesome like every other date we'd had. I made us dinner, and we watched movies, and the whole time, he was as affectionate as he had always been. And I've heard from many people that he's not a touchy person, but he has always been affectionate with me.

He spent the night (not the first time we spent the night together), and the next morning we went to the mall in my area where he bought us coffee and held my hand while we shopped. After that, he left around one in the afternoon because he had to work at four and wanted to get the the gym.

I haven't heard from him since he left on Thursday.

On Friday, I texted him before he worked saying, "I hope work goes well for you cute boy :)" and I never heard back. It's now been five days since we've communicated.

What I was wondering is if I could text him kind of asking where we stand. I was thinking something along the lines of, "Hey ___. I thought things were going pretty well, so I'm a little confused about why we haven't talked since you came up to my place. If you're not interested, or need space or whatever, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me know."

If we had only been on one or two dates, I'd leave it alone, but I think that after five dates, I deserve a little bit of an explanation.

I'd appreciate any help or advice. :]


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Most Helpful Guy

  • give him a week max. maybe he got errands or issues he busy to settle with, but do drop a little message in a cute way like above asking if he been busy. after a week if he doesn't reply move on cause its clear that's he lost interest. hope I helped & hope things get better for you

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What Guys Said 4

  • He probably needs space and I don't think pressuring him is a good idea. Maybe the guy been alone for a long time and he got used to it, and believe me we guys get involved in a lot of activities like Martial Arts, Video Games, Reading books, hitting the gym like there is no tomorrow, running 8 miles and chill with our buddies .Imagine if this is his lifestyle and to some degree it's fulfilling him. Now after meeting you he needs to give up or cut down the hours of his involvement in these activities especially if non of what is listed falls under your interest.

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  • send him another text, but I'd stay away from a message that directly asks what is going on - a casual "hey, haven't heard from you in a few days, how's it going?" will be fine. if he doesn't respond, cut your losses and move on.

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  • Maybe he has a problem letting people get close to him, like if he has been hurt in the past and is reliving a war story in his head or something.

    Because of that he may feel like you are beening too clingy.

    Or maybe you are just being too clingy in reality.

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  • Since you already texted him, I wouldn't send him another text. The ball is in his court at this point. The five-day delay is a bad sign, though.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think its right to text him and get an answer. If he doesn't reply, I'd take the hint and move on.

    Good luck to you!

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  • sure you deserve an explanation but I'm pretty sure his silence shows his intent.

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    • I'm just not sure because some people say he could just be waiting for me to talk to him or be playing a little hard to get. If he didn't answer the text, I would definitely consider that my answer and my final attempt to reach out.

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