We are not in a relationship but have been on one date and it was great but we live very far from each other. We've known each other for a year...
We were recently suppose to get together and not only did he not show up, he didn't tell me he wasn't coming until after I sent him a frustrating text message the night we were suppose to meet...He asked me Wed if I had plans that Sat night so we agreed to get together then. He asked for my location and such...
When Saturday came, I asked him in the late afternoon what time he thought he'd be there to pick me up. No response. An hour later I notice while I'm on Facebook he "became friends" with someone just shortly after I had texted him. Of course that irritated me but I tried not to over react and I gave it a bit more time but once an hour rolled around I finally texted him how rude and thoughtless he was and that he should have told me if he wasn't coming.
Literally 2 minutes later he sent me a picture of a bunch of drugs, claiming that he was in the middle of an arrest and that it had been holding him up (he is a police detective) . He apologized and said he "really DID want to see me" and not to be upset.
Why could he ALL OF A SUDDEN text me when I'm upset but couldn't do so when he had time to go on Facebook? Plus, he indicated he really "DID" want to see me, meaning he was no longer coming. So because of all of this, I was pissed!
I told him I know things happen but he should have told me a long time ago. He rebutted with what time his "arrest" supposedly happened but it contradicted what time he said he got off so he kind of told on his self. And I also brought up his insensitivity to not even responding to text. That is another thing about him that frustrates me. He will sometimes not reply to texts even if a response is necessary. I confronted him about it a while ago and he said he didn't mean to do it and that he'd try to stop. He no longer did it for a long time but he continued again and I just stopped communicating with him...I had originally asked him if he was planning on coming after work because I knew the drive to where I was was long, but he never responded... When I brought this up (and when he didn't respond again) I basically told him how much of a jerk he was and to never contact me again...He said he had planned on making it up to me by coming to see me and he "felt really bad" but I refused to buy it. So he told me he'd leave me alone and wouldn't contact me again. . .
I feel like we are not even in a relationship so these are things we should not even be arguing about! And I didn't even feel like confronting him on the lie he got himself into . I'd like to know if my actions and how I handled this were indeed justified or was telling him not to contact me again too much? He DID apologize but everything else in addition is what pretty much had me upset.
Most Helpful Girl
I agree with what you did. I've dated guys who act like that at times and they're just great at apologizing. But the truth is that if a guy is blowing you off and acting like this at the start it's because he really doesn't care that much, which sucks, but it's true. It's best for you to just have a clean break so you can move on because he's never going to change.1